10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (10/5-10/7)

10. Terry Francona Finds a New Job
            Unfortunately, it’s not with the Red Sox.

9. Messi and Ronaldo Both Score Twice, Match Ends in a Draw

            I don’t know what Nou Camp is, but anything that puts the two best futbol players in the universe on the same field works for me.

8. Ridiculous Infield Fly Call Helps Cardinals Hang On Against Braves

            Here’s a simple rule all umps should follow…if the left fielder is calling for the ball, than the infield fly rule does not apply.

7. South Carolina Pounds #5 Georgia

6. Florida Shuts Down #4 LSU
5. NC State Stuns #3 Florida State
            The last time three teams in the top 5 lost on the same day was October 11, 2008. Interestingly enough, that was the same day friend of the blog Mike Stevens and I spent an inordinate amount of time trying to find a bar that was televising Game 2 of the ALCS between Boston and Tampa Bay. The events clearly aren’t related, but I thought I would note it.

4. Texas Rangers Finish Off End Of Year Choke, Lose Play-In Game to Baltimore
            It’s great to see Baltimore advance deeper into the post-season, but it’s also a shame that this is likely the end of the Josh Hamilton era in Texas. Mostly because that means Boston will probably pay him $220 million this winter.

3. Drew Brees Breaks Consecutive Games With a Touchdown Pass Record
            Even more important for New Orleans, the Saints finally got a win. 

2. Matt Kenseth Dodges Massive Last Lap Wreck at Talladega

            Sunday’s finish was ridiculous, even by Talladega’s lofty standards of wild endings.

1. Colts Honor Their Coach, Shock Packers

            Storming back from a 21-3 halftime deficit, Andrew Luck and company played out of their minds in an effort to win for Head Coach Chuck Pagano, who was diagnosed with Leukemia six days prior.

Bobby Valentine - "I'm Keeping the Seat Warm for Francona"

Chicago, IL (AP) – Bobby Valentine dropped a bombshell before Thursday’s game with the White Sox, revealing that Boston hired him as a ploy to return the fan’s faith in former manager Terry Francona.

            “John Henry thought it would take until June for Red Sox Nation to begin chanting for Terry,” says Valentine, “Needless to say, I’ve exceeded his expectations.”
            Executives in the Red Sox front office never wanted to fire Francona after last season, but according to Valentine, knew Red Sox Nation would not be happy if they didn’t make a change after their disastrous performance in September.
           “The folks running this team know Boston fans have the I.Q. of an infant squirrel,” a relaxed Valentine said while leaning back in his chair, “So by hiring a dummy like me to run the team, Red Sox Nation would immediately forget about one of the worst September collapses in baseball history.” Valentine went on to rant about how he doesn’t fit in with the Red Sox.
            “You know I like to do things like lay on tanning beds, or lay out in the sun, or you know, any activity that makes my skin more orange. During the first day of Spring Training, Pedroia asked if I wanted to play a game of cribbage. Cribbage! My Nana played cribbage. I don’t belong in a place where I have to play board games with people.”
            Valentine didn’t say whether or not ESPN was in on the scheme, but did say that if Francona were rehired, it would be very likely that he would return to television.

Why I Could Care Less About the Red Sox and MLB

            At the time I’m starting to write this, it’s been roughly 22 hours since the completion of the most epic collapse in baseball history. My interest in baseball has been waning considerably over the past four years, but Wednesday night’s events were enough to suck me back in (EDITORS NOTE: By sucked back in, I mean following the nights action through my fantasy baseball team, because my keeper league team was in position to win a championship. Sadly, my fantasy team is more important than the Red Sox. More on that later). While Papelbon was throwing batting practice fastballs down the heart of the plate, one question kept popping into my head… why don’t I care?

              Longer than I remember, I always was a Red Sox fan. Somehow in my early years, Mike Greenwell was my favorite player (a career .303 hitter, 130 homers, 726 RBIs). Perhaps it was his 1988 season where he finished second to Jose Canseco in the AL MVP voting that sucked me in, although I was three years old in 1988, so I doubt I had much of an understanding of that sort of thing. Ages 10-13 are when my sports interest began increasing exponentially by the day, which was right at the beginning of the Nomar-Pedro era. The most enjoyable sports viewing experience of my life was the 2004 playoff run, with games four and five of the ALCS standing out the most. Over a 30-hour period, it felt like the Sox and Yankees played for 15 of them. It was truly magical stuff (years later we would find out that a lot of it was scientific stuff due to the amount of steroids that were used by both teams, but we didn’t know that at the time). Sadly though, my love of baseball and the Red Sox is on life support. In no particular reason, here are the reasons why I could’ve given a rat’s ass if Boston won or lost this past Wednesday.

- Baseball Games Take Too Long (most of the time)

            This one really hit home during the 2010 World Cup. I’m not much of a soccer guy, but I knew that when a game started at 2pm, the game would be over in roughly two hours. Baseball purists will argue that the beauty of America’s pastime is that the game could literally go on forever, but it’s a problem when games actually feel like they will last forever. Especially since the “Moneyball” method has become the predominant approach of major league clubs (working the pitch count to draw walks and wear down opposing pitchers), you’re lucky to see a Red Sox-Yankees game that takes under three hours. Call me a stick in the mud, but I’m at a point in life where I like to have a good idea of when something is going to end.

- The Economic Structure of Baseball is Broken

            Last year, the Super Bowl winning team came from a town with an estimated population of 104,057. If a baseball team were in Green Bay, it would be lucky to have a payroll over $20 million. The only chance this fictional Green Bay baseball team would have of competing would be to nail the draft for two or three years, and then hope all of the prospects hit the majors at the same time for a two year window before they are all eligible for free agency and sign with other teams for more money. Call me crazy, but I’ll take the economics of the NFL (where cities like Green Bay and Kansas City have enjoyed success) over MLB everyday and twice on Sunday.  And to spin it back to my issues with the Red Sox, how am I supposed to feel bad that a team that spent $100 million less than them overtook them for a wildcard spot?

- Fantasy Baseball is Much More Interesting

            A selfish reason, but the bottom line is I was much happier about Evan Longoria’s September in regards to my fantasy team than I was bummed out about his performance leading Tampa over the Red Sox.

- I Don’t Have Enough Time to Follow 162 Games

            Back in junior high school, there wasn’t a sports event that I missed. As I’ve gotten older though, I’ve had to cross a few things off the list. College football was the first to go because of working every Saturday during high school. The lack of a playoff combined with the corruption across the major programs make me very happy about that decision. NHL was next thanks to the lockout and the games being on a network that I didn’t have for four years (look for a huge NHL comeback in the Muir household this season though. Stupid NBA). With working full-time and having a family, I can’t make the time to watch well over 20 hours of Red Sox baseball per week. It would be one thing if the game was more entertaining, but we’ll leave that discussion for the next bullet point.

- Steroids Era Baseball Was Better

            I’m in the minority (although maybe not based on the major decline in MLB television Ratings and attendance), but I loved steroids baseball. Watching Mark McGwire, Sammy Sosa, and Barry Bonds blast 500+ foot home runs was breathtaking. I don’t care what chemicals they used to hit them. Remember McGwire in the 1999 Home Run Derby at Fenway Park? I’d link to the video of it, but MLB is dumb and won’t allow their videos uploaded on YouTube. You’ll just have to trust me that it was damn good television.

- I Have Little Respect For the “Dominance” of Pitching

            For any moron that wants to blame the decline in offense on the “great depth” of pitching in baseball today, I’d first like to show you the stats Greg Maddux put up during his prime (his final year with the Cubs and first six with Atlanta).

YR	GP	CG	SHO	IP	W	L	SO	ERA	WHIP
1992	35	9	4	268	20	11	199	2.18	1.01
1993	36	8	1	267	20	10	197	2.36	1.05
1994	25	10	3	202	16	6	156	1.56	0.90
1995	28	10	3	209.2	19	2	181	1.63	0.81
1996	35	5	1	245	15	11	172	2.72	1.03
1997	33	5	2	232.2	19	4	177	2.20	0.95
1998	34	9	5	251	18	9	204	2.22	0.98

            Next, let’s take a look at Pedro Martinez from 1997 (his final season with Montreal) through his first six seasons with the Red Sox.

YR	GP	CG	SHO	IP	W	L	SO	ERA	WHIP
1997	31	13	4	241.1	17	8	305	1.90	0.93
1998	33	3	2	233.2	19	7	251	2.89	1.09
1999	31	5	1	213.1	23	4	313	2.07	0.92
2000	29	7	4	217	18	6	284	1.74	0.74
2001	18	1	0	116.2	7	3	163	2.39	0.93
2002	30	2	0	199.1	20	4	239	2.26	0.92
2003	29	3	0	186.2	14	4	206	2.22	1.04

            Keep in mind that these two men were pitching against guerilla juiceheads that can now only be found on “Jersey Shore”. Pitching against the chem.-free hitters of today, Pedro and Maddux probably could have sub 1.00 ERAs.

            Thanks to Terry Francona for letting his pitchers get wasted in the clubhouse on their days off. Thanks to Carl Crawford for woefully underachieving (the poor guy should’ve signed with Anaheim. Money isn’t everything). Thanks to the Boston season mercifully ending, I will watch football on Sundays in peace, which is what I would’ve done anyway, but now four percent of me won’t feel guilty about ignoring the Sox.