A Jet Dryer Exploded, and Other Things That Happened in the Daytona 500

The Daytona 500 was on really, really late last night. Much later than most racing fans are used to staying up. My Dad was asleep before Jimmie Johnson's crash, and that was the second lap of the race. Here's a review of all the noteworthy events that happened during the race.

Juan Pablo Montoya Crashed Into a Jet Dryer
        

            The odds of Montoya’s suspension breaking, and then consequently forcing his car to slide directly into a jet dryer, must’ve been 1,000,000 to 1. When Darrell Waltrip says that a crash is the most bizzarre event he’s ever seen, that means something. 

Jimmie Johnson Gets Knocked Out 2 Laps Into the Race

            As soon as it was confirmed that there were no serious injuries, the 2012 Sprint Cup season officially got off to the best start possible (for No Credentials anyway) with the elimination of the five-time champion. Elliott Sadler made the most of his one-off appearance in the 33 car.

The Jet Dryer Exploded

            I had never given much thought about what could happen if a car careened into the back of a jet dryer, but I supposed if I had to list the five most possible outcomes of such an event, explosion probably would’ve made the list.             

Danica Patrick and Trevor Bayne’s Suspensions Ruined By Wet Grass

            To get rid of the 48, I guess we also had to give up two of the fan favorites. On a sunny day both Bayne and Patrick would’ve been fine, but their cars sunk so low into the wet grass that their suspensions actually dug into it. It was a real shame for Bayne, who had a car fast enough to win the race.

Seriously, It Was a Fucking Inferno

            I just watched this video 10 more times. I could watch it 500 more.

Jeff Gordon’s Engine Blows Up

            Gotta hand it to ol’ Gordo. Even when his engine blows, he still gets praise for alerting his fellow competiters to get away from him.

My Wife Thought Dave Blaney’s Name Was “Dave Baloney”

            Blaney was the number one supporting actor to the gigantic fireball in turn 3, because if the track was too damaged to race, he was in position to win the race. He generated so much interest in the Muir house that we researched the specifics of the company that sponsored his car. Even more importantly, Blaney was trending on Twitter. 

Brad Keselowski Tweets From His Car During the Red Flag

            I don’t think I will ever hear a good reason why Keselowski felt the need to have his cellphone on him during the Daytona 500, but it proved to be tremendous foresight. Keselowski tripled his Twitter followers by the end of the race.

Tide?

            It’s easy to forget that NASCAR used be a country bumpkin affair (with all the corporate sponsorships and all), but the fact that laundry detergent was used to wash off 200 gallons of jet fuel was a great reminder of the sport’s old school roots.

Matt Kenseth Wins, Dale Jr. Ends Up Second

            At roughly 12:51am Tuesday morning, Kenseth held off Dale Earnhardt Jr. and Greg Biffle (Biffle may or may not have been dragging his break so Dale Jr. wouldn’t be able to pass Kenseth, but we’ll leave that for the Junior Nation conspiracy theorists) to earn his second career Daytona 500 win.