I had the Jets penciled in here, but the return of Gronk is enough to vote for a Patriots cover.
Patriots (-4) over JETS
3-3 San Diego Chargers @ 0-6 Jacksonville Jaguars
I
have zero faith in the Jaguars (for obvious reasons), but asking a west coast
team to follow up a Monday night game with a 1pm east coast game is a recipe
for ruined suicide pools everywhere. Jacksonville might not have a better
opportunity to win all year.
JAGUARS (+8) over Chargers
4-2 Cincinnati Bengals @ 4-2 Detroit Lions
Andy
Dalton sucks. It’s a shame Tom Brady couldn’t inherit the Cincinnati receiving
core.
LIONS (-3) over Bengals
2-4 Buffalo Bills @ 3-2 Miami Dolphins
The
Bills are your classic case of a fun home team that gets slaughtered on the
road.
DOLPHINS (-7.5) over Bills
4-2 Chicago Bears @ 1-4 Washington Redskins
The
last time this season I said I didn’t understand a line, it also involved the
Bears, and they ended up getting run out of the gym by the Lions. Here’s proof
that I don’t learn from past mistakes.
Bears (+1) over REDSKINS
3-3 Dallas Cowboys @ 3-3 Philadelphia Eagles
The
combined record of teams Philadelphia has beaten this year is 1-15 (that’s not
a misprint). It’s not exactly the ’93 Cowboys that Chip Kelly’s group is going
up against, but I still want to see them perform against an average team before
I begin recommending them for betting.
Cowboys (+2.5) over EAGLES
3-3 St. Louis Rams @ 2-3 Carolina Panthers
If
the Panthers lose this week, they should fire Ron Rivera.
PANTHERS (-6.5) over Rams
0-5 Tampa Bay Buccaneers @ 1-4 Atlanta Falcons
In a
classic battle of two teams going nowhere, we’ll back the one that isn’t
starting a third round pick at quarterback.
FALCONS (-7) over Buccaneers
4-2 San Francisco 49ers @ 3-3 Tennessee Titans
Tennessee
put up a valiant effort in Seattle last week, but there’s a long track record
of teams performing worse the week after facing the physical Seahawks.
49ers (-4) over TITANS
2-4 Houston Texans @ 6-0 Kansas City Chiefs
I
don’t have many gambling rules, but here’s one…when a team is starting a
quarterback you’ve never heard of on the road, and you’re getting less than a
touchdown betting on the best defense in the league, you bet your life savings
on it.
CHIEFS (-6.5) over Texans
3-3 Cleveland Browns @ 3-2 Green Bay Packers
The
spunky Browns will keep this close before Aaron Rodgers bails out the Packers
with one of his classic 60-yard heaves.
Browns +10 over PACKERS
3-3 Baltimore Ravens @ 1-4 Pittsburgh Steelers
I
have no idea who to pick in this game. I guess I’ll take the points.
Ravens (+1.5) over STEELERS
6-0 Denver Broncos @ 4-2 Indianapolis Colts
Don’t
bet against Peyton Manning at night, especially when he’s returning to Indianapolis
for the first time.
Broncos (-7) over COLTS
1-4 Minnesota Vikings @ 0-6 New York Giants
Sadly,
this game would get better TV ratings than a baseball playoff game if there was
one being played on the same night.GIANTS (-3.5) over Vikings
Ethan's Picks
Patriots, GRONK!!!
Jags, I think it is time for Rivers to lose 6 in a row.
Bengals, Lions slip out of first in the division.
Flipped a coin, Bills.
Bears
Eagles, I think it is pretty sad the Nick Foles is going to ruin the Cowboys season. Sad for Cam.
Rams
Atlanta, testicular fortitude of Matty Ice wins this game and against a team they should beat by a lot.
Titans, until I see something bright out of that asshole that spent most of his time kissing his biceps last year. (Editors note: there may be some residual fantasy sports resentment in that previous sentence...)
Chiefs, I see 2 pick 6s by the Chiefs coming.
Browns, I don’t think Rodgers can go with a Brady-ish receiving core.
Ravens
Broncos, I am calling it here, they go 16-0 but lose in the 2nd round of playoffs.
Vikings, I see AP running for 273 yards.
Jags, I think it is time for Rivers to lose 6 in a row.
Bengals, Lions slip out of first in the division.
Flipped a coin, Bills.
Bears
Eagles, I think it is pretty sad the Nick Foles is going to ruin the Cowboys season. Sad for Cam.
Rams
Atlanta, testicular fortitude of Matty Ice wins this game and against a team they should beat by a lot.
Titans, until I see something bright out of that asshole that spent most of his time kissing his biceps last year. (Editors note: there may be some residual fantasy sports resentment in that previous sentence...)
Chiefs, I see 2 pick 6s by the Chiefs coming.
Browns, I don’t think Rodgers can go with a Brady-ish receiving core.
Ravens
Broncos, I am calling it here, they go 16-0 but lose in the 2nd round of playoffs.
Vikings, I see AP running for 273 yards.
No Credentials and Ethan's Picks Last Week = 9-6
Ethan Season = 47-42-3
Thursday Picks = No Cred 1-0, Ethan 0-1
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