10. Flavor Flav Claims He Lost Virginity at Age 6
This is just one of many claims Flav is making in his new memoir. I’ll question this boast, but I have no doubt that he at least blew $5.7 million on drugs in a six-year span.
9. Bike Week Begins in New Hampshire
For those of you that don’t live in the Granite State, Bike Week is an event where thousands of men who are smack dab in the middle of a mid-life crisis act like 22-year olds for a week. Women whose faces look like worn out catcher’s mitts join them. Depending on your ideals, this may or may not sound like a good time to you.
8. Allan McNish Survives
I’ll let the raw video do the talking here.
7. Bartolo Colon Pulls Up Lame, Hits DL
This is a bittersweet story for me. On one hand, it’s a good thing that the Yankees are losing him for a couple of weeks. On the other, one of my fantasy teams is losing Colon. Both New York and myself were surely expecting the 270-pound Colon to suffer some sort of ailment at some point during the season.
6. U.S. Soccer Loses to Panama
Because soccer is weird, the United States is not eliminated from the Gold Cup, but they should be after losing to a country that is most famous for having a big canal.
5. MLB Seriously Considering Realignment
I don’t own stock in the Orioles, Rays, or Blue Jays, but I’m all in favor of coming up with a system that makes things a little fairer for those teams. I’ll cast my vote for two 15-team leagues with no divisions.
4. Junior dos Santos Destroys Shane Carwin
Carwin was given a broken nose and a fractured cheekbone after getting pounded for three rounds. Dos Santos will move on to face heavyweight champion Cain Velasquez.
3. Jeff Gordon Wins at Pocono
Gordon’s 5th career win at Pocono will at worst give him a wild-card entry into The Chase.
2. Canucks Score Late, Take 3-2 Series Lead Over Boston
Game 5 had the look of a game that would be decided by an odd bounce. Unfortunately, it didn’t go the Bruins way. I’m fully expecting a Bruins win in Game 6 (you know what that means regular No Credentials readers, get your money on Vancouver right now).
1. Dallas Mavericks Defeat Miami Heat, Win NBA Championship
I’m going to write more about this series and where these two teams go from here, but let me write some random thoughts down here.
a. I’ve never been happier for a citizen of Germany than I am for Dirk Nowitzki. Oddly enough, my feelings for Dirk are similar to Larry David’s feelings for Oscar the dog.
b. Can we please stop asking Lebron James to be Michael Jordan? It’s just not going to happen. If you want to watch MJ play, go look at old highlights on You Tube (I was going to save this for my next column but my head is exploding as I’m watching Jon Barry, Michael Wilbon, and Magic Johnson talk about him on “Sportscenter”).
c. Rick Carlisle is the unofficial “Best Basketball Coach Alive” as of right now. Switching to a zone when Dirk went out with two fouls in the 1st quarter kept Dallas in the game.
d. Cleveland doesn’t have a lot going on these days, so I’ll award them the right to share in the Dallas championship celebration.
NO CREDENTIALS SUMMER SCHEDULE – This will be the last “10 Awesome Things” column that will be posted until September 12th, 2011. I still plan on making a minimum of two posts per week. Here are topics that will be covered this summer.
- Fantasy Baseball (and maybe once in a blue moon, real baseball, but don’t count on it)
- NFL and NBA labor issues (sadly, my two favorite leagues are in jeopardy of missing future games)
- NASCAR (that’s right, I want to try to get negative page views this summer)
- If the NFL ever resumes normal operations, NFL preseason team previews
- Fantasy Football Draft Tips
- Reviews and commentary on summer events, such as the US Open golf tournament
Thanks to all eight of you that regularly have read the weekend review every Monday. Keep your fingers crossed that there will be NFL games to talk about when the weekend review returns in September.
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