Monday, May 7, 2012

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Past Weekend (5/4-5/6)

10. Eric McClure is Still With Us
            If McClure’s crash in Saturday’s Nationwide Series event at Talladega had happened in 2000 instead of 2012, he would be dead. Yet another reminder of how important the safety improvements in Motorsports has been.  

9. Shaq Gets His Degree
            If getting his degree gets him one step closer to leaving the TV set with Charles Barkley, I’m all for Shaq earning the title of “Doctor”.

8. Thunder Sweep Mavericks
            It’s not often you get to see two rosters on totally different long term tracks face off in a playoff series. Dallas essentially punted 2012, clearing enough cap space to make a run at both Dwight Howard and Deron Williams in the off-season. Unfortunately for them, Howard elected to remain under contract for one more season, and now Dallas might not be attractive enough (only Dirk Nowitzki and Jason Kidd are under contract for next season) to warrant Deron Williams giving up more money to bolt Brooklyn. Oklahoma City on the other hand, looks like an emerging super power. When James Harden plays the way he did in Game 4 against the Mavericks, the Thunder are unstoppable.

7. Kings Sweep Blues
            I may be in the minority (the television ratings for the Western Conference Finals will prove that), but it’s pretty cool to have the Kings back as a competitive hockey club. Not since Little Wayne was in town has Los Angeles been relevant.

6. Albert Pujols Finally Hits a Home Run
            Mike Scioscia should’ve given Pujols a day off on April 10th instead of May 5th.

5. Capitals Even Series With Rangers
            Has there been a quicker change of identity by a NHL team than what the Capitals have pulled off the past year? They’ve gone from being a high scoring, up-and down attack to a style that isn’t far off of the dreaded trap used by the New Jersey Devils in the 1990s. What they’ve done so far against the top two seeds in the East is remarkable.

4. Knicks Finally Win a Playoff Game
            You have to give Amar’e Stoudemire some credit. After doing something incredibly dumb (punching a glass fire extinguisher case qualifies as “incredibly dumb” in my book), it would’ve been easy for him to disappear while his team was swept out of the playoffs by a superior Heat squad. Stoudemire went the other way, playing with heavy padding on his left hand and giving the Knicks a huge lift in the first quarter. Miami is probably going to slaughter the Knicks Wednesday night, but this win at least gives New York fans some hope that a Carmelo-Stoudemire pairing can be successful.

3. Brad Keselowski Pulls A Fast One at Talladega
            Keselowski’s solution to holding on to the lead on the last lap at Talladega was so simple, it’s amazing no one else had thought of it before. Even more amazing was Tony Stewart apologizing to the fans because they didn’t crash enough.  

2. Celtics Take Control With 2 Wins Over Atlanta
            After nearly choking away Game 3, it was important for Boston to lay the smack down Sunday evening. They’ll look to close out the disinterested looking Hawks Tuesday night at Atlanta.

1. I’ll Have Another Wins Kentucky Derby  
            My attachment to I’ll Have Another started thanks to a blog post where my main objectives were to make fun of every horse’s name and find a horse to waste a $20 bet on. It resulted in the greatest random gambling moment in the history of No Credentials. Here’s the video, followed by a breakdown of what No Credentials was thinking during each segment of the race.      



0:00-0:34 = One of the few things I understand about horse racing is that a good start is crucial. Starting in post position 19 (the second slot from the left on screen), if I.H.A. got buried behind 10 horses it was over. Fortunately, he didn’t get mired in the pack, and had a nice little space of his own through the first turn.

0:35-0:59 = I.H.A. is cruising on the tail end of the mid-pack while Bodemiester is setting a blistering pace. Not sure why Bodemiester’s jockey was pushing him so hard early. Maybe he had a hot date. At this point my wife thought I’ll Have Another was done, but I was optimistic. “The horse that leads early never wins,” I said. You’d almost swear that I knew things about horses.

1:00-1:40 = I’ll Have Another makes his move, weaving through four different horses to place himself in second as they turned for home. I was stunned that by ridiculous $20 bet (with 12/1 odds!) actually had a chance of hitting.

1:41-1:49 = Here’s some dialogue from the Muir home at this point in the race.
My Wife = “He’s too far behind.”
No Credentials = “He’s coming.”

1:50-1:54 = Go, go, go…

1:55-2:00 = (insert fist pumping here) GO, GO, GO, GO, GO!!!…

2:01-2:18 = …GO, GO, GO…YAAAAAAAAA!!! WHOO!!!!!!!!
            My son, perplexed as to why Daddy would be screaming about horses, finally figured out that all the commotion was a good thing and started throwing in some little “WHOO!”s for good measure. Screw football. Horse racing is the new favorite sport of No Credentials.

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