2014 No Credentials NBA 30

            We’re starting our first set of season ending awards here at No Credentials, and here’s the criteria for how it works.

-         Based on regular and post-season results, we picked three players for ten different “teams” (the NBA has been obsessed with “Big 3s”, so this number makes sense).

-         Players were chosen based on who we would want to have under contract for the next four years, so youth and potential are favorable traits. Likewise, players like Tim Duncan were left off the list.

-         The second and third picks for each team were based on who was previously drafted on another club; meaning one team didn’t select two point guards or two centers.

-         This list was made from memory without looking at statistics for each player, although stats will be used in each player’s write-up.

-         Potential rookies were not included on the list.

Without further ado, the 2014 No Credentials NBA 30

Third Wheels

30. DeMar DeRozan, SG, Toronto Raptors

            DeRozan posted career highs in points (22.7 per game), boards (4.3), and most importantly, assists (4.0) while helping lead the Raptors back into the postseason. He isn’t the most efficient player, but if he learns to stop chucking from the 3-point line (a shade over 30% while attempting almost 3 per game) that will improve. Quietly, he’s a top-5 SG at only the age of 24.

29. Al Jefferson, PF-C, Charlotte Hornets

            Big Al was the driving force behind Charlotte snagging the seventh seed in the East, posting his first season over 20 points and 10 boards per game since 2008-09. When it comes to scoring from the low post, few do it better than Jefferson.

28. Chris Bosh, PF, Miami Heat

            Bosh added semi-reliable three-point shooting to his skill-set this year, which added a new dimension to the Miami attack.             

27. Lance Stephenson, SG-SF, Indiana Pacers

            Stephenson obviously has his issues, but no one can question his desire to win. It would be interesting to see what could happen if we went to a team that offered a larger offensive workload, but he’s likely going to stay in Indiana.

26. Kyle Lowry, PG, Toronto Raptors

            Criminally underrated to the point that he was left off of the All-Star team, Lowry was Toronto’s MVP after Rudy Gay was shipped to Sacramento. When his head is on straight, he’s a championship caliber player.

25. Serge Ibaka, PF-C, Oklahoma City Thunder

            Ibaka’s value was fully realized when he sat out the first two games of the Western Conference Finals. His improved shooting from three point range bodes well for the future of the Thunder offense.

24. Eric Bledsoe, PG-SG, Phoenix Suns

            Fellow Sun Goran Dragic was also in the mix to make the 30, but ultimately Bledsoe’s upside pushed him ahead of his teammate. Health is the only thing holding Bledsoe back, and barring another injury, we are expecting a full breakout next year.

23. Damian Lillard, PG, Portland Trail Blazers

            This feels a little low for Lillard, but when watching him he feels like a guy who’s already close to his ceiling. Comparing his numbers from his rookie and sophomore campaigns support that theory. Regardless, he’s still a big-time shot maker who delivered one of the top-5 moments of the playoffs with his series winning shot against the Rockets.

22. Dirk Nowitzki, PF, Dallas Mavericks

            Dirk is the oldest guy on this list, but as good a shooter as he is we think he’d still hold value as a spot-up stretch four on the right team when he’s pushing 40.

21. Bradley Beal, SG, Washington Wizards

            Beal’s story is similar to DeRozan’s, except Beal can hit 3s and is four years younger. It isn’t ridiculous to think Beal could be the best shooting guard in the NBA as soon as next season.

Second Banana’s

20. Kevin Love, PF, Minnesota Timberwolves

            Love is a gifted offensive player and fantastic rebounder, but the rest of his defensive skills leave much to be desired. A championship can be won with Love, but a rim-protecting center and an elite point guard are needed.

19. Tony Parker, PG, San Antonio Spurs

            Parker’s getting up there in age, which is concerning considering his game is predicated on his ability to get into the paint. Regardless, his role as a catalyst on the team that just won the Finals earns him a spot on this list.

18. Carmelo Anthony, SF-PF, New York Knicks

            I considered copying and pasting what I typed about Kevin Love here, but instead I’ll just tell you to reread Love’s right up and swap out “Love’ for “Carmelo”.

17. Kyrie Irving, PG, Cleveland Cavaliers

            It’s not Irving’s fault that he plays for a team that fired the same coach twice within four years. There’s a good chance Irving’s best years will happen on another team sometime down the road.

16. Blake Griffin, PF, Los Angeles Clippers

            Griffin was a monster this year, but we’re still not putting him into the top-10. If he backs up the season he just had next year, we’ll have to push him that high.

15. Joakim Noah, PF-C, Chicago Bulls

            Noah was far and away the most consistent defensive player in the NBA this season, and he upped his value even more by posting a career high 5.4 assists per game this season. He’d be the perfect compliment for either Kevin Love or Carmelo Anthony.

14. James Harden, SG, Houston Rockets

            We’d like to see Harden revert more to his playmaking days from Oklahoma City rather than being a volume shot taker, but he’s still either the first or second best shooting guard in the league.

13. Dwight Howard, C, Houston Rockets

            Howard quietly delivered what the Rockets were looking for when they signed him last year, with the only disappointing number being his blocks dipping under 2 per game for the first time since the 2006-07 season. Howard seems to be understanding that he doesn’t need to dominate the ball in the post, and should be even more effective if Houston is able to land another star player this off-season.

12. Marc Gasol, C, Memphis Grizzlies

            Along with Howard, Gasol is the only other true center in the league that can adequately handle playing in a small-ball lineup. I’d like to see Memphis utilize him more, as his playmaking ability is elite for a man of his size.

11. DeMarcus Cousins, PF-C, Sacramento Kings

            I understand that Boogie is bonkers, but there’s no denying that he is the dominant low-post scorer in the NBA. If we didn’t have a history of behavior issues, he’d be in the top-5.

Franchise Players

10. Chris Paul, PG, Los Angeles Clippers

            There’s a legitimate case to be made that Paul has a history of postseason choking, but there still isn’t another point guard I’d rather have running my half-court offense.

9. Paul George, SG-SF, Indiana Pacers

            George made a giant leap this season, but next year he needs to establish more game-to-game consistency to place him in the discussion of best players in the league.

8. John Wall, PG, Washington Wizards

            Even if Derrick Rose (who was left off this list due to health concerns) returns near full strength, Wall will still be the best point guard in the Eastern Conference. We’ll go out on a limb and predict Wall makes his first run at League MVP next season.

7. LaMarcus Aldridge, PF, Portland Trail Blazers

            Aldridge is arguably the best 18-foot jump shooter in the league, which is a real asset for floor spacing. I don’t think anyone would’ve thought that Aldridge would be so highly regarded when he was drafted out of Texas.

6. Stephen Curry, PG-SG, Golden State Warriors

            The shot making has always been there, but it’s his 8.5 assists per game in 2013-14 that’s noteworthy. The turnovers need to come down, but Curry is well on his way to establishing himself as a true floor general.

5. Russell Westbrook, PG-SG, Oklahoma City Thunder

            More often than not this postseason, it was Westbrook taking the critical shots in crunch time instead of Kevin Durant. Whether that’s a bi-product of selfishness or being the guy with the biggest onions is up for debate, but there’s no doubt that Westbrook is a top-5 talent. Ultimately we’d love to see the Thunder find a point guard and shift Westbrook to the 2, as he would be fully unleashed to attack when he has the ball in his hands.

 

4. Kawhi Leonard, SF, San Antonio Spurs

            At first glance, this seems like an epic overreaction to his NBA Finals MVP award, but Leonard truly deserves to be ranked this high. For starters, he’s only 22 years old. If he was on a team other than San Antonio, his points per game would be significantly higher, but his unselfishness makes him the perfect Spur. There’s no one better suited physically to guard Lebron James, and even when tasked with guarding the leagues best player he’s still able to produce on the offensive end. Do it all players like Leonard don’t grow on trees, and San Antonio is fortunate to have one of it’s pillars for the post Duncan era in place already.

3. Anthony Davis, PF, New Orleans Pelicans

            The Brow was an absolute monster this year, and looks poised to lead the next generation of NBA stars after Lebron and Durant move on. His defensive production was never in doubt when he came out of Kentucky, but you’ll be hard pressed to find someone who thought he could average more than 20 points per game as a 20-year old. The sky truly is the limit for him, and he’s a dark horse to finish first on this list next season.

2. Kevin Durant, SF, Oklahoma City Thunder
            Durant is a post-up game away from being the most dominant player in the league. His playmaking skills are already improved (he posted a career high assist rate this year), but he needs to be able to get the ball closer than 25 feet away from the basket in crunch time.

1. Lebron James, SF, Miami Heat

            Lebron’s no longer the most dominant offensive player on the planet (Durant has passed him there), but it’s his defense that gives him the top spot on our list. He’s the only player in the NBA capable of guarding point guards, wings, and power forwards. James has the most impact on defense on a nightly basis, and at 29, still has some prime years left in him.

            Here’s what our ten trios ended up being. Feel free to comment here, on Facebook, or Twitter to pass along your thoughts on our first annual NBA 30.

Team	Player 1	Player 2	Player 3
1	Lebron James, Heat	DeMarcus Cousins, Kings	Bradley Beal, Wizards
2	Kevin Durant, Thunder	Marc Gasol, Grizzlies	Dirk Nowitzki, Mavericks
3	Anthony Davis, Hornets	Dwight Howard, Rockets	Damian Lillard, Trail Blazers
4	Kawhi Leonard, Spurs	James Harden, Rockets	Eric Bledsoe, Suns
5	Russell Westbrook, Thunder	Joakim Noah, Bulls	Serge Ibaka, Thunder
6	Stephen Curry, Warriors	Blake Griffin, Clippers	Kyle Lowry, Raptors
7	LaMarcus Aldridge, Trail Blazers	Kyrie Irving, Cavaliers	Lance Stephenson, Pacers
8	John Wall, Wizards	Carmelo Anthony, Knicks	Chris Bosh, Heat
9	Paul George, Pacers	Tony Parker, Spurs	Al Jefferson, Raptors
10	Chris Paul, Clippers	Kevin Love, Timberwolves	DeMar DeRozan, Raptors

NBA Season Wrap-Up = The NBA Finalists

2. Miami Heat
No Credentials Pre-Season Rank = 1
Fantasy MVP = Lebron James (duh)
            After being dismantled by the Spurs, it’s clear that Miami needs a reboot. What that entails is unclear, with The Big 1 featuring Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh having the option to test free agency this summer. Ultimately, everything hinges on what Lebron James decides to do. It’s unclear how much communication James has had with Wade or Bosh on this issue, as we predict there’s a 50-50 chance they do the same thing in unison. If Lebron acts on his own and decides to test the waters, we expect both Wade and Bosh to resign in Miami, as the only way they are getting another long-term deal is if it’s at a reduced pay rate. Our money is on that scenario occurring, with the Heat looking to horde cap space for the 2015 (when both Wade and Bosh come off the books) free agent class.
            In a vacuum, it would make the most sense for all three to opt out, with Lebron resigning for the max, Wade re-upping at reduced rate (think something along the lines of the $10.5 million Tim Duncan earned this year), and Bosh landing somewhere in between. It’s unlikely Carmelo Anthony joins forces with them (would make way more sense for him to go to Houston with Dwight Howard as his rim protector), but reducing Wade and Bosh’s salary would give the Heat to the opportunity to replenish their depleted bench. Ray Allen is an unrestricted free agent mulling retirement (can we get him on a plane to O.K.C?), Shane Battier is officially retired, and the Birdman/Haslem combo is probably on it’s last leg. We’re predicting that this summer will almost be as crazy as “The Decision”.



 



1. San Antonio Spurs

No Credentials Pre-Season Rank = 3
Fantasy MVP = Tim Duncan (seriously efficient in only 29 minutes per game)
            More than any other team in recent memory, San Antonio played the game of basketball as well as any club ever has in a NBA Finals. Normally rotations or shrunk, and star players are needed to carry a team to the promised land, but the Spurs were unselfish to the perfect extent, ending most possessions with open threes or quality looks in the paint.
            We’re operating under the assumption Tim Duncan and Greg Popovich will both return, which means the majority of the Spurs championship roster will remain in intact. Boris Diaw and Patty Mills are the only key contributors entering unrestricted free agency (sorry Matt Bonner), but with the salary cap expected to rise above $70 million, we’re expecting Diaw to return. Mills should’ve earned himself a starting gig somewhere with his performance in the playoffs (Indiana could sure use a point guard), but that wouldn’t be a devastating loss for the Spurs. The Western Conference will still be ridiculous next season, but with Kawhi Leonard’s Conference Finals MVP performance ushering the next generation of Spurs greats, we expect the Spurs to be in the thick of the title hunt again.

NBA Finals Prediction

            It’s kind of hard to believe that it’s our first NBA Finals rematch since the Bulls and Jazz clashed in 1997 and 1998, but that’s what will occur when Miami and San Antonio start their series Thursday. This year, it really boils down to whether the deeper team (the Spurs) can overcome the best player (Lebron James). For grins and giggles, let’s go back and look at past NBA Finals and see how many teams the winning team had the best player.

2013: Lebron James (Heat won in 7)

2012: Lebron James (Heat won in 5)
2011: Lebron James (Mavericks won in 6. All hail Dirk)
2010: Kobe Bryant (Lakers won in 7)
2009: Kobe Bryant (Lakers won in 5)
2008: Kobe Bryant (Celtics won in 6)
2007: Lebron James (Spurs won in 4. That Cavs team around Lebron was a joke)
2006: Dwyane Wade (Heat won in 6)
2005: Tim Duncan (Spurs won in 7)
2004: Shaquille O’Neal (Pistons won in 5)
2003: Tim Duncan (Spurs won in 6)
2002: Shaquille O’Neal (Lakers won in 4)
2001: Shaquille O’Neal (Lakers won in 5)
2000: Shaquille O’Neal (Lakers won in 6)

            By my count, since years started with a “2”, the team with the best player is 11-3 in the NBA Finals. We’re cheering for the Spurs, but we can’t in good conscious bet against Lebron James

 
Heat over Spurs in 7

NBA/NHL Postseason Awards

            We just ended a two-month stretch where literally every night of the week there was either a playoff basketball or hockey game on. I realize most folks are split one way or the other in which sport they favor more (especially the hockey crowd. If you want to hear a slew of inappropriate words in quick succession, ask a die-hard puck-head what they think about all of the basketball highlights on Sportscenter), but for me, they almost blend into each other. And for my wife, she complains that I hog the television for 70 straight nights (it’s been four years, she should know by now right?). For my money, the NBA/NHL playoffs are the best time of the year in sports.
            On the night that we should be watching the Bruins and Blackhawks play in an epic Game 7, we hand out some fake awards for both leagues, and in the end, pick which sport had the stronger playoff season.

Most Memorable Game

NBA = NBA Finals Game 6, Spurs @ Heat
NHL = NHL Stanley Cup Finals Game 6, Blackhawks @ Bruins
            I had the Bruins epic Game 7 comeback against Toronto penciled in for this honor for a week, but when you score two goals in 17 seconds to win the Stanley Cup, that trumps everything.
            As for the NBA, Game 6 probably will go in the books as one of the ten greatest games ever played. It wasn’t a display of basketball excellence (Lebron tried to choke twice in regulation before Ray Allen bailed the Heat out), but in terms of drama, the only game that comes close in the last decade was Derek Fisher’s miraculous 0.4-second jumper in 2004 against the Spurs (which shouldn’t of counted because it should be physically impossible to catch, turn, and shoot in less than half a second, but whatever).

Team With the Best Long Term Outlook
NBA = Indiana Pacers
NHL = Boston Bruins
            Indiana could lose David West this off-season (I’m betting on him resigning, but we’ve been wrong in this space before), but with Paul George reaching franchise player status, the Pacers have two legitimate building blocks in George and Roy Hibbert. If they can add a three-point specialist off the bench (it’s not out of the realm of possibility that the Pacers would’ve been in the NBA Finals if they had signed Carlos Delfino for $3 million instead of the Rockets), Indiana is perfectly positioned to contend in the Eastern Conference for the next several seasons.
            It might be hard to believe Boston is all right after their shocking Game 6 collapse, but the core of the team is still very young. Tyler Seguin still has room to grow into a franchise player (I don’t think the lockout did him any favors), and Patrice Bergeron and David Krejci established themselves as legitimate A-quality centers. The Bruins will be favorites in the East for the foreseeable future.

Breakout Player

NBA = Stephen Curry, PG-SG, Golden State Warriors
NHL = Tukka Rask, G, Boston Bruins
            It feels like years ago, but remember when Stephen Curry was assaulting Denver and San Antonio with a ridiculous 3-point barrage night after night? Watching Curry go bonkers (and simultaneously, the Warriors fans losing their minds) was the highlight of the NBA playoffs. If Curry ever figures out how to keep his ankles from rolling, Golden State now has the knowledge that a championship team can be built around him.
            Tukka will shoulder some of the blame Boston’s Game 6 collapse, but it’s important not to forget how valuable he was to the Bruins during their Finals run. He was a brick wall against the talented Pittsburgh Penguins, and was even better against New York. No one will ask about Tim Thomas anymore (at least they shouldn’t). This is Rask’s team now.

Most Disappointing Club

NBA = Oklahoma City Thunder
NHL = Washington Capitals
            The Russell Westbrook knee injury was the great what-if of these playoffs (other than of course, if the Thunder didn’t ship off James Harden before the season). A healthy Westbrook plus whatever Oklahoma City is able to add after they amnesty Kendrick Perkins (wishful thinking) should return the Thunder to the top of the Western Conference.
            I don’t think anyone was expecting the Capitals to march to a Stanley Cup, but squandering Alex Ovechkin’s return to MVP form was extremely disappointing.

MVP

NBA = Lebron James, SF, Miami Heat
NHL = Patrick Kane, RW, Chicago Blackhawks
            No Credentials didn’t go out on a limb here (both players were the playoff MVPs of their respective teams), but both deserve to be mentioned again. Kane carried the Blackhawks while Jonathan Toews was struggling, while Lebron cemented his status as one of the five greatest NBA players of all time.

Which League’s Playoffs Were Better?

            The NHL normally jumps out to a huge lead in this yearly race thanks to a Round 1 that actually is competitive (most NBA round 1 match-ups are runaways), but the NBA stepped up it’s game this year. Stephen Curry’s 3-point explosions were enough to pull off an upset of the third seed in the West. Chicago outlasted Brooklyn in a brutal triple overtime slugfest (friend of the blog Nate Robinson went ape shit remember?), and Houston was able to push the Thunder after the Westbrook injury. We’ll still give the first round victory to the NHL (Boston’s Game 7 against Toronto alone accomplished that), but it was close. Basketball scored higher marks the rest of the way however. Round 2 was highlighted by a valiant effort by Golden State against the Spurs, while the Pacers pushed the Heat to the brink in the Eastern Conference Finals. Finally, when your league year ends with it’s best player performing at his absolute best to win a title, the clear winner in the fight (unless you’re a diehard hockey fan) is the NBA.

Heat-Spurs Prediction

     Miami looked like it was on fumes against Indiana, but San Antonio doesn't possess the multiple low-post threats that Indiana had. It will popular to bet on the Spurs, but don't fall for it. We're not cheering for it at No Credentials, but unless Lebron James loses a limb, Miami will go back-to-back.

Heat over Spurs in 6

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (3/1-3/3)

10. Kyle Busch Dominates Nationwide Race at Phoenix
            Because you know, it’s a good thing when an established Sprint Cup driver dominates a second tier race.

9. Rick Finds Morgan on “The Walking Dead”

            Unfortunately, Morgan was off his rocker.

8. Real Madrid Knocks Off Barcelona For the Second Time in a Week

            Surprisingly, pretty boy Cristiano Ronaldo actually got the better of Lionel Messi for a change.

7. Joe Flacco Inks Largest Contract in NFL History

            Not to take away from Flacco, who had an incredible postseason, but I could think of 12 to 15 quarterbacks I’d rather have starting for my team instead of him next season.

6. Blackhawks Extend Point Streak to 22 Straight Games

            I don’t think we’ve seen a hockey team play this well since the late-90s edition of the Detroit Red Wings.

5. Magic Johnson Offers Lebron James $1 Million if He Wins Dunk Contest
            No Credentials has been suggesting that cash should be used as the primary motivator for all exhibition events involving professional athletes, so kudos to Magic Johnson for making the offer.

4. Heat Net 14^th Straight Win in Madison Square Garden

            The Knicks jumped out to a 16-point first half lead, but it wasn’t a large enough cushion to hold off Lebron James. Miami pushed the streak to 15 games tonight.

3. Penguins Win 7-6 Barnburner in Montreal
            Who needs an NHL All-Star team when these two teams combined for 80 shots Saturday night.

2. Carl Edwards Brings Back the Back Flip, Wins at Phoenix

            I think everyone can agree that NASCAR is a way more fun when Cousin Carl is relevant.

1. Bruins Score 3 Times in Third, Stun Lightning

            Sunday night’s loss to arch rival Montreal put a damper on the weekend, but Boston’s efforts at home Saturday afternoon should not be forgotten.

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Past Weekend (2/15-2/17)

10. Rick Grimes Keeps Seeing His Dead Wife
            I watch “The Walking Dead” to see zombies, not a dude going bonkers and making out with a ghost.

9. Rafael Nadal Wins First Tennis Tournament Since Returning From Injury

            Tennis is way more interest when Nadal is in the mix. That’s your Troy Aikman-esque comment of the day, sponsored by “You’re Absolutely Right Joe”.

8. Lionel Messi Scores 300^th Career Goal For Barcelona

            Here’s your obligatory mention of futbol in the weekly top 10 to soak up some cheap page hits from Europe.

7. Terrance Ross Wins the Worst Dunk Contest Ever

            Want to get some stars into the dunk contest? Let’s offer a $1 million (after taxes) to the winner. You’ll get some name guys to particpate for that prize.

6. Michael Kidd-Gilchrist Admits He Lost 1-on-1 Game Against Michael Jordan

            I’d make fun of Kidd-Gilchrist more, but I once got up-faked by a dude in his sixties a couple of years back.

5. #2 Duke Gets Upset By Maryland
            Here’s this week’s installment of the “Big Time College Basketball Upset That No Credentials Doesn’t Give A Shit About”, sponsored by Apple Cider Vinegar.

4. Kyrie Irving Takes Home 3-Point Shootout Championship

            An impressive showing by the Cavaliers budding superstar point guard, who scored 23 out of a possible 30 points in the final round against New Hampshire’s own Matt Bonner.

3. Kevin Harvick Starts Lame-Duck Season With Sprint Unlimited Win
            We won’t put too much stock in this win as the majority of the top teams were knocked out early in the race, so don’t look for Harvick to be ranked very high in this week’s NASCAR season preview.

2. Danica Patrick Wins Daytona 500 Pole

            NASCAR has a long list of “storybook” outcomes, so here’s where Danica’s pole winning run ranks.

1. Richard Petty claiming his 200^th and final career win with Ronald Reagan in attendance at the 1984 Firecracker 400 (Petty was, and still is, a diehard Republican, so this victory turned into a glorified campaign stop for Reagan while he was running for his second term in office).

2. Dale Earnhardt Jr. winning the Pepsi 400 just five months after his father died in a last-lap crash in the 500 (as someone who watched the whole race live, I don’t care about the conspiracy theory. That was the most memorable NASCAR victory by anyone of the entire decade).
3. Danica Patrick winning the pole for this year’s Daytona 500.

            You might think I’d come down negatively on this, but you’d be mistaken. Qualifying at Daytona is in the discussion of most boring things you could ever watch on television. Furthermore, qualifying means very little at a restrictor plate track where cars zoom from the back to the front in less than a handful of laps. If NASCAR did anything to “encourage” a pole-winning run by Patrick, I’d call that some damn good marketing.

1. Chris Paul Quarterbacks West Win in NBA All-Star Game

            Paul was the MVP, Kevin Durant was the best scorer, but it was Kobe Bryant’s two blocks of Lebron James that will go in the books as the most memorable moments of the game.

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (2/8-2/10)

10. Nemo Barrels Through the Northeast
            I’m not sure when we started naming blizzards (I remember most winter events being remembered by things like “Ice Storm of ’98” or “Blizzard of ‘32”), but this weekends storm system deserved to be named after something much tougher than a Pixar fish.

9. Cristiano Ronaldo Nets a Hat Trick

            We usually save our soccer praises for Lionel Messi (who despite leading a 6-1 romp on Sunday, gets a week off), we’ll call out the pretty boy on Real Madrid for a job well done.

8. Rusty Wallace, An Old Guy, and Three Dead People Join NASCAR Hall of Fame

            Rusty was one of the pillars of the sport when I was first getting into it as a youngster. I’ve mocked him several times in this blog (whether it was including him on the list of worst ESPN employees, or shamelessly linking to the video of his ’93 crash at Talladega), but for all he’s done for NASCAR, he deserved to get in.

7. Rob Ryan Lands With the Saints

            Ryan has always cooked up a good gameplan for the Saints, so this isn’t a shock at all.

6. California Pulls Off Road Upset at #7 Arizona

            Here’s your “Top-10 Upset That No Credentials Doesn’t Give a Shit About Of The Week”, sponsored by Prestone.

5. Clippers Survive 3^rd Quarter Carmelo Onslaught
            Carmelo had 38 points by the end of the third quarter, but somehow only managed to put up two shots in the fourth.

4. Half-Court Heave Leads to Wisconsin’s Overtime Upset Over Michigan

            I’m all-in on desperation heaves that improbably tie basketball games. Michigan feels like a #2 seed that’s going to get bounced in the second round.

3. Lebron Dominates Again
            Five straight games with 30+ points while shooting better than 60% from the floor is ridiculous.

2. Notre Dame Needs Five Overtimes to Knock Off Louisville

            For those not in the know, that’s a lot of fucking overtimes.

1. Celtics Pull Out Triple Overtime Victory, Now 7-0 Without Rondo

            You can’t be surprised at all that Boston dropped Monday night’s game against the Bobcats after the epic tilt they had with the Nuggets on Sunday.

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (1/25-1/27)

10. Danica Patrick and Ricky Stenhouse Announce That They Are Dating
            I have high hopes for Stenhouse, so hopefully this doesn’t derail his career.

9. Juan Montoya Clinches Another Rolex 24 Win For Chip Ganassi

            I’m not emotionally invested in sports car racing (the cars are cool, but they get to spread out for my liking), but mentioning Montoya is the perfect excuse to show what happened to him last February at Daytona.

 

8. Lebron Celebrates $75,000 Half-Court Shot With a Fan

            Thanks to the lovely tax code, Michael Drysch will only get to keep $53,000 of it.

7. Saturday Night Live Mocks Ray Lewis

            The only thing this skit missed was a steroids reference.

 

6. Villanova Stuns #3 Syracuse

            Here is this week’s “Major College Basketball Upset That No Credentials Doesn’t Give A Shit About”, sponsored by VAGISIL.

5. Kobe Learns To Pass

            If this were still 2012, I’d say it was another sure sign of an impending apocalypse.
         
4. Northern Illinois Scores Four First Half Points In a Division I Men’s Basketball Game
            Thankfully, they exploded for 21 points in the second.

3. Ashley Wagner Wins U.S. Figure Skating Championship

            I don’t know where my life went wrong, but I watched roughly an hour of this event, and was thoroughly entertained.

2. Carmelo Drops 42 On the Hawks

            Anthony had been crushing the field goal percentage of my second fantasy basketball team for weeks, so Sunday’s explosion was much appreciated.

1. Celtics Outlast Heat in Double Overtime, Then Find Out Rondo Has Torn ACL
            A potentially season saving win was marred by the news that Rajon Rondo blew out his knee in Friday night’s double-overtime win over the Hawks.

How the Heat Won

            Sadly, the day has come where we have to refer to the Miami Heat as NBA champions. Hard to believe that just two weeks ago Celtics fans were expecting to beat them in Game 6 of the Eastern Conference Finals. Let’s take a quick look at the six reasons Miami won the title.

Lebron James is the Best Basketball Player on Earth

            Even the most avid of Lebron haters (I’m talking about you Dan Gilbert) have to admit that he reached his peak this post season. He attacked the basket. He hit the open man. He crashed the boards. He didn’t jack 25-footers. Lebron James couldn’t of played his last seven games (we’ll include the final two games against Boston) any better. 

Chris Bosh Got Healthy

            Miami doesn’t beat OKC with just Wade and Lebron. Bosh has his flaws, but his timely shot making was huge.

The Heat’s Scrubs Showed Up

            We haven’t seen a weirder NBA team in the last 25 years. When Miami’s supporting cast doesn’t show up (like last year against the Mavericks), they look like a lottery team. When guys like Mario Chalmers, Shane Battier, and Mike Miller are draining wide-open 3s, they are unguardable. So far this formula is successful 50% of the time.

Oklahoma City’s Youth Worked Against Them

            Oklahoma City made all the mistakes a young team is prone to make on a big stage. They inexplicably left Miami’s 3-point shooters wide-open over, and over, and over, and over, and over again. As a matter of fact, I think Mike Miller just hit another 3, and the game ended over an hour ago. The Thunder let the referees get into their head on more than one occasion. They would pass up open jumpers, only to end up taking contested ones. James Harden in particular was a mess in this series, although most of that can be attributed to getting demolished in the paint by Lebron James. Every important player on this team not named Kendrick Perkins is 25 years old or younger, so they will learn from this defeat. 

Derrick Rose’s Knee Disintegrated Into 12,000 Pieces

            Forgive me for putting a couple of what ifs together, but it’s my blog, and I can do whatever I want. Keeping in mind that Chris Bosh didn’t play for the first four games of the Eastern Conference Finals, I’ll go out on a limb and say the Bulls would’ve spanked the Heat if Rose was healthy. Bulls fans can bring that too the grave with them if they like.

The Homeless Man Who Was Almost Eaten to Death Was Cheering For Miami

            I’m sure by now most of you heard about the homeless guy in Florida who got 80% of his face chewed off by a guy that was high on bath salts. What you may not have known was this guy was a Miami Heat fan. Throw in the Zombie Sonics fans that were cheering against Oklahoma City, and it appears that fate was against the Thunder.

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Past Weekend (5/18-5/20)

10. Kerry Wood Strikes Out a Dude, Then Retires
            Wood’s decision to retire after a strikeout is one of the coolest baseball stories of the past decade. Call me crazy, but I think he took a page out of the George Costanza playbook in deciding to leave on a high note.

9. Jimmie Johnson Wins All-Star Race

            Thanks to the ill-fated format change (on paper rewarding winners of each segment with a prime starting spot for the final 10 laps wasn’t a horrendous idea, except for once Jimmie Johnson won the first segment, he had no reason to drive hard for the next 60 laps), this race will go down as the most hated All-Star race in history. To erase any ill will created by Saturday night’s debacle, here’s the classic finish of “One Hot Night”, the first Motorsports race run under the lights on a super-speedway.

8. Chelsea Wins First Champions League Title

            Heroics by Didier Drogba (a legend in EA Sports FIFA games for years) carried Chelsea to an unlikely victory over Bayern Munich.

7. Lebron and Wade Combine For 70 Points to Lead Miami to Game 4 Win

            Apparently it took a desperate situation to bring out the best in Miami’s dynamic duo. In a series where Indiana now probably has the 3^rd-10^th best players, they’ll need to carry their momentum into Game 5.

6. Strasburg Ks 8 in Five Innings, Also Hits a Home Run

            With as talented as Strasburg is, I’m shocked he didn’t also come up with a cure for cancer during his start Sunday against Baltimore.

5. Spurs Sweep Clippers

             There isn’t a hotter team in the NBA than the oldest team in the NBA not named the Boston Celtics.

4. Celtics Blow 15-Point Lead, Let 76ers Even Series

            Thankfully, Boston got their act together in Game 5.

3. Papelbon Records Save in First Career Appearance Against Red Sox

            After their former closer (who apparently Boston couldn’t afford because you know, they don’t have much money or anything) shut them down in an embarrassing loss, it was imperative for Boston to sweep the weekend games.

2. I’ll Have Another Wins Another Race

            I wish I could take as much credit for I’ll Have Another’s success in the Preakness like I did with the Kentucky Derby, but I waffled a little bit and threw him and Bodemiester in a two horse parlay (which won, thank you very much). No Credentials will be cheering I.H.A. on when he attempts to win the first Triple Crown in 34 years at the Belmont.

1. Durant Buries The Lakers, Thunder Take 3-1 Series Lead   

            If not for some shady calls by refs Friday night, we’d be talking about an Oklahoma City sweep. Kevin Durant is clearly the best player in this series (his effectiveness on the defensive end appears to be growing with every game), and Russell Westbrook is making a case that he’s the second. There battle with the Spurs in the Western Conference Finals will be one for the ages. 

No Credentials "Mailbag" 5-18-12

            As usual, these may or may not be actual messages from real or fake people.

Assuming that the Mayans are on to something, what are the best signs that the end of days will be upon us soon? – Edgar, Lynn, MA

            Here’s two clear events that might lead you to plan you finances so you have $0 in your bank account on December 21^st, 2012.

2. Kanye West dating Kim Kardashian – If these two create offspring, we’re dead. We’re all DEAD.

1. Dick Clark died – Assuming that the Mayans are right, I’m guessing this conversation happened shortly before Clark passed away.

God: It’s your time.

Clark: I can’t leave yet! That’ll leave Seacrest all alone on New Year’s Eve. He’ll ruin the show!
God: The world is going to explode 10 days before New Year’s Eve this year. You won’t have to worry about that.
Clark: Well if that’s the case, can I listen to Robert Johnson in Heaven?
God: You can download him on Lord-Tunes, but you can’t see him live. He went straight to Hell.

So Mariano Rivera is indestructable for parts of 3 decades, but his replacement can’t even stay upright for two weeks? Tony, Riverhead, NY

            Whenever an unusually durable athlete does down to an injury, the replacement always goes down with an ailment of his own shortly after. A similar thing happened when Brett Favre’s consecutive games streak came to an end in 2010. Tavaris “The Virus” Jackson tore a knee ligament the next week.

(EDITORS NOTE: In a year that MLB instituted a second wildcard in an attempt to insure that the Yankees and Red Sox make the playoffs, isn’t it funny that the odds of both squads making it this year are very low? Both team's bullpens are suspect. Boston’s starting pitching has been inconsistent, while New York’s aging offense has been sputtering (with the exception of Derek Jeter, who figured out that ditching Minka Kelly was the key to restoring his power stroke). The only saving grace for both teams has been the struggles of the Angels, who No Credentials predicted would be a shoe-in for one of the two Wildcard spots (I’m not giving up on them yet. It’s still way to early to count out any team, assuming they don’t play in Kansas City, Minnesota, Seattle, Oakland, Houston, Chicago, or San Diego), are five games under .500 at the time of this writing.

Justin Bieber says he has “had a beer”. What brand do you think it was? Tasha, Harrison, ME

            What a great question. Let’s rank the top-5 candidates in reverse order.

5.  Mike’s Hard Lemonade

4.  Molson Canadian (he's from Canada after all)
3. Smirnoff Triple Raspberry Lemon Shake w/hint of Pineapple (guessing this is a custom beverage Smirnoff made for the Bieb)
2. Skyy Blue
1. Labatt Blue

Who do you have winning the Preakness? – Abigail, Red Rock, TX

            I want to stay loyal to I’ll Have Another, but facing a small field with very few sprinters, Bodemiester should have an easier go of it. He won’t need to try to set a land-speed record in the first half of the race, and should have plenty left in the tank coming down the stretch. 

Still trying to wrap my head around how Chris Bosh makes such a huge difference for the Miami Heat. Sam, Epping, NH

            Anyone that knows anything about basketball would never argue that Chris Bosh is the second best player on the Miami Heat. However, one could make a case that he’s the second most valuable player the Heat have. The similar skill sets of Lebron James and Dwyane Wade make it hard for them to function together in the same play (unless it’s a fast break). More often than not, one of them gets the ball at the top of the key and runs a pick-and-roll with a Miami big (when healthy, that big would be Bosh) while the other stands on the side and watches from the 3-point line. With Bosh out, whoever is setting the screen for James/Wade is not a consistent threat to score in a pick-and-roll. This allows the opposing big men to clog the lane and shut down drives to the basket. Miami’s half-court offense has morphed into the basketball equivalent of a poop sandwich without Bosh.
            The secret to solving this problem? Run James and Wade in the pick and roll together (if Lebron bitches about playing the 4, tell him to shut the fuck up), surround them with Chalmers and whichever stiff you want to plug in at small forward (I’ll vote for Shane Battier over Mike Miller and James Jones) on the wings, with Joel Anthony on the backside to hit the offensive glass (not that he could catch an offensive rebound, he’s much more likely to fumble it out of bounds). The most likely outcomes of running this offense would be a drive to the basket or a wide open 3. Let’s make sure Coach Spo doesn’t see this paragraph until the Heat are eliminated by the Pacers.      

How much do you have to like hockey to give a shit about Kings-Coyotes? – Ed, Manchester, VT

            I’ll grade myself a slightly above average fan of hockey (I play fantasy hockey, that earns me the above average tag), and I’m struggling to care about this one. Anything involving Phoenix makes it hard to take seriously, espeically when you have a throwback match-up in the Eastern Conference.

Who wins a fight, Axl Rose or a pissed off Kurt Busch? – George, Hickory, NC

            This one would definitly be a lightweight division battle. Kurt is certainly a volitale personality, but all of his abuse has been verbal. Axl’s willingness to throw a fist or two gives him the edge.

"Its black and white". Translation - its obvious, crystal clear, incontrovertible, fact. I understand the statement. I often use it.

           So now I give you my problem (question). Why is it black and white? Is it because they are equal and exact opposites? If that were the case why would we not say "its positive and negative" IE battery terminals? And if we are basing this on black and white being equal and exact opposites we must take into consideration that black isn't a color and as we all know white is. ( We could debate that statement until I was blue and you were red in the face) Or is it because we look at it like words on a page? Something written in a "matter of fact" way? If this is the case, could we say "blue (ink) and yellow (paper)"? Walk into any Staples and shop around the Post It and Sharpie section and we might be saying "Its pecker pink and pumpkin orange". But maybe that wouldn't have the impact the user was looking for.
          And what if your colorblind? I guess in that case white, blue, black or yellow don't apply. Ultimately Wrench, what I'm asking is why is it "black and white". And please don't tell me its obvious, crystal clear, incontrovertible or fact. – Ryan B., Kearsarge, NH
          I think there were 16 questions in the previous two paragraphs. For fear of drifting too far into a gray area, we’ll let the question stand on it’s own. Until next time…