10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (9/27-9/29)

10. San Francisco Giants Give Hunter Pence $90 Million Extension
            Because when you can grossly overpay for a guy who put up a .283-27-99 line, you have to do it. I guess.

9. Henderson Alvarez Throws MLB’s Third No-Hitter in 2013

            Reason number 63,239,120,134 why baseball needs steroids. At least this no hitter was quirky.

8. Jimmie Johnson Wins Record Eighth Race at Dover

            No Credentials isn’t right very often (check our Week 4 NFL picks for proof), but we feel pretty good about nominating the Kenseth-Johnson-Busch trio as the cars to beat for the 2013 title. Johnson has put all memories of his late-summer swoon to bed.

7. Georgia Outguns LSU
            In a rare shoot-out in the SEC, Georgia’s Aaron Murray proved to be too much for LSU in the fourth quarter. After a season opening loss at Clemson, Georgia has put itself back into the national championship picture with two impressive conference victories.

6. Andy Pettitte Tosses a Complete Game in His Final Start

            Sunday was a nice moment for Pettitte, who during the Yankees dominant run in the late-90s was one of the key home grown cornerstones along with Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera.

5. Broncos Drop 52 on Philadelphia
            Peyton Manning and company simply ran the Eagles defense out of the building. Manning is on pace for 64 touchdowns through the first quarter of the season, which is a Madden-like pace.

4. Patriots Notch First Impressive Win of the Season, Beat Falcons

            Like most of this weekend’s NFL results, No Credentials didn’t see this one coming. Roddy White’s high ankle sprain has really put a damper on the Falcons offense. Unfortunately, the win came at the cost of Vince Wilfork, who is done for the season.

3. Seahawks Pull Off 17-Point Comeback in Houston

            Even Tony Romo said, “Man, that was a shitty throw”, when Matt Schaub made an awful across the body pass off his back foot that ended up in Richard Sherman’s hands. Denver has been flashier, but Seattle is the most impressive team in the first month of the season.

2. USC Cans Lane Kiffin

            As far as slime-ball college football coachs go, Lane Kiffin is at the top of the list. He’s never done anything that warranted any head coaching position he’s held. Glad to see him get the boot.

1. Walter White Takes Care of Business

            It was a fitting finale for one of the greatest television characters of all time.    

Week 4 NFL Picks

Week 4 Bye Weeks = Green Bay Packers (1-2), Carolina Panthers (1-2)
 

Pittsburgh Steelers (0-3) vs. Minnesota Vikings (0-3)

Sunday, 1pm, CBS, O/U 42.5
Game will be played in London
            There isn’t a better way to further promote America’s passion across the pond than shipping two winless teams overseas to play. Ultimately, Pittsburgh’s defense should be enough to get them back in the win column.

Steelers (-3) over Vikings

 

Baltimore Ravens (2-1) @ Buffalo Bills (1-2)

Sunday, 1pm, CBS, O/U 44
            Buffalo looks like a group that will play much better at home than on the road this season, but I think Baltimore squeaks this one out. Almost thought about picking a push.

Ravens (-3) over BILLS

 

Cincinnati Bengals (2-1) @ Cleveland Browns (1-2)

Sunday, 1pm, CBS, O/U 42.5
            Cleveland already won one more game than their general manager was hoping they would win this season. I’m expecting a major beat down.

Bengals (-4.5) over BROWNS

Indianapolis Colts (2-1) @ Jacksonville Jaguars (0-3)

Sunday, 1pm, CBS, O/U 42.5
            This line is three points too high, but I can’t in good faith place any betting faith in Blaine Gabbert.

Colts (-9.5) over JAGUARS

 

Seattle Seahawks (3-0) @ Houston Texans (2-1)

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 42
            Tough one to call for me, but AT THE END OF THE DAY it feels like a game that Houston needs to win more.

TEXANS (+2) over Seahawks

 

Arizona Cardinals (1-2) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-3)

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 40
            Wouldn’t shock me at all if Arizona’s defense outscores Tampa Bay’s offense. Greg Schiano better be getting his resume ready.

Cardinals (+2.5) over BUCCANEERS

 

Chicago Bears (3-0) @ Detroit Lions (2-1)

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 48.5
            Explain to me how the Lions are favored in this game please? Last time I checked, the combined records of the teams they beat this season is 0-6.

Bears (+2.5) over LIONS

New York Giants (0-3) @ Kansas City Chiefs (3-0)

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 44
            For me, this was the toughest line to pick all week. It feels like the score will be lopsided, regardless of which team wins.

CHIEFS (-4.5) over Giants

 

New York Jets (2-1) @ Tennessee Titans (2-1)

Sunday, 4pm, CBS, O/U 40.5
            Could the Jets be the worst 2-1 team in NFL history? They are in the discussion.

TITANS (-4) over Jets

 

Dallas Cowboys (2-1) @ San Diego Chargers (1-2)

Sunday, 430pm, FOX, O/U 47
            This is normally a game the Cowboys would lose, but I’m starting to get a feeling about this year’s squad. If your desperate for help at wide receiver in fantasy, add Cowboys rookie Terrance Williams.

Cowboys (-2.5) over CHARGERS

 

Washington Redskins (0-3) @ Oakland Raiders (1-2)

Sunday, 430pm, FOX, O/U 44
            Through the first three weeks, Oakland has been a better team than Washington. If they lose, it will be by a field goal or less.

RAIDERS (+3.5) over Redskins

Philadelphia Eagles (1-2) @ Denver Broncos (3-0)

Sunday, 430pm, FOX, O/U 58.5
            Ethan made the point in his write up that I already had posted here, so scroll down and see what he wrote.

BRONCOS (-11.5) over Eagles

 

New England Patriots (3-0) @ Atlanta Falcons (1-2)

Sunday, 830pm, NBC, O/U 50.5
            Above all else, Atlanta’s desperation trumps anything New England brings to the table. I won’t be surprised if this one gets ugly.

FALCONS (-2.5) over Patriots

 

Miami Dolphins (3-0) @ New Orleans Saints (3-0)

Monday, 830pm, ESPN, O/U 48.5
            Miami is legit. This line is three or four points too high.

Dolphins (+7) over SAINTS

 

Ethan’s Picks

Steelers - Apparently Matt Cassel is starting this game. I attended a Matt Cassel MNF game with Cameron where he threw 3 TDs and was still getting booed at Gillette Stadium (EDITORS NOTE: I think it was five touchdowns, and he also managed to get sacked seven times). It was pretty awesome.

Ravens - The defense is starting to gel.

Bengals - I am always scared Andy Dalton is going to throw 4 INTS though.

Colts - Hopefully they aren’t riding too high after last week’s big win.

Seattle - If Houston scores more than 10 I will be surprised.

Cardinals - This is a coin flip. If this game is aired on Fox I am going to be pissed.

Bears - I am pretty surprised that Detroit is favored here. The scoreboard will be lit up like Jessie at his peak of meth addiction.

Chiefs - At some point the Giants will get it together, but not this week.

Titans - I see a horrible game from Geno Smith in the forecast.

Cowboys - I picked them to choke against St. Louis, so they will probably throw me under the bus this week.

Raiders - I really don’t like RGIII. Oakland has a pretty good pass rush so I hope to see him get smacked around this weekend.

Broncos - Peyton is going to throw for 600 yards and 5 TDs because the Eagles will three and out in less than a minute 7 times in this game.

Patriots - First tough game for the Pats, but it certainly is not the strongest defense they have faced.

Dolphins - Even though I picked the Pats, they will probably lose, Miami will pull out a big win and then we get to listen to people blow it way out of proportion that Miami is leading the division. In the end it will not matter. There is nothing that I would not bet that New England wins the division this year.

No Credentials Week 3 Picks = 9-6-1

Ethan’s Picks = 7-8-1

No Credentials Season = 25-21-2

Ethan’s Record = 26-20-2

Our Thursday Pick = 1-0

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (9/20-9/22)

10. Ohio State Wins By 76 Points

9. Louisville Wins By 72 Points
            In other words, it was a rough slate of college football games this weekend.

8. Henrik Stenson Wins Fed-Ex Cup

            Will I be bouncing my grandkids on my knee telling them about the time Henrik Stenson won the 2013 Fed-Ex Cup (for those not in the know, that’s some weird golf trophy the PGA made up after NASCAR created The Chase. For those not in the know about that, The Chase was NASCAR’s attempt to create a playoff system, even though 30 other cars that aren’t competing for the title are still on the track at the same time. We’ll invite the Jaguars to the Super Bowl this year and see how that works out. I’m ending this rant now)? No, but assuming Stenson is from Sweden, I’m happy for him. I don’t know what that means, but I needed to fill some space in the blog this week, so there you go.

7. Matt Kenseth Wins Second Straight to Open Chase
            Historically awful when racing in the woods of New Hampshire, Kenseth surged to the front during the final 100 miles. Kyle Busch came home second again to give Joe Gibbs another 1-2 finish.

6. Colts Manhandle 49ers

            I genuinely don’t know what to make of San Francisco’s listless performance against Indianapolis. They’ll have to right the ship quickly before their Thursday night date in St. Louis.

5. Redskins Lose Again at Home
4. Carolina Humiliates New York 38-0
            Not since the mid-90s have Dallas Cowboys fans had the pleasure of their two most hated rivals sucking so much at the same time. Washington couldn’t stop a Swiss army, while the Giants looked completely lost.

3. Jon Jones Survives UFC 165

            He’d never been taken down in the octagon, but Alexander Gustafsson was able to beat and batter the Light Heavyweight champ. Jon Jones won a lot of fans back into his corner after the backlash from bailing out on a pay-per-view event a year ago.

2. Cleveland Browns Destroy Suicide Pools Everywhere, Shock Vikings

            Logically, Cleveland had no chance of winning in the Metrodome, but as despised ESPN anchor Chris Berman would say, “THAT’S WHY THEY PLAY THE GAME.”

1. Bengals Win Back and Forth Struggle Over Green Bay

            It wasn’t always pretty, but Cincinnati firmly established itself as the second best team in the AFC with it’s rousing victory over the Packers. Even former No Credentials whipping boy Terrance Newman had a moment of glory when he ran back the game-winning fumble return.

Week 3 NFL Picks

            A deer had a death wish and decided to jump into the side of my car, which wouldn’t of been a big deal if I wasn’t driving it at the time. We’re keeping the analysis short, but just know that No Credentials bounced back from a terrible Week 1 to claw back over .500 for the season.

1-1 TITANS (-3) over 1-1 Chargers

            We’re still riding the Titans bandwagon, even after their disappointing overtime loss in Houston.         

0-2 VIKINGS (-7) over 0-2 Browns

            Not totally comfortable laying a touchdown with Christian Ponder as my quarterback, but that’s outweighed by a team who just traded it’s best player and is starting Brian Hoyer at quarterback.

(EDITORS NOTE: Before the deer ruined my Wednesday night, I was fully prepared to type a piece on the Trent Richardson trade, but we’ll settle on a short analysis here. To make a long story short, it’s a great trade for Cleveland. Runningbacks have virtually no value on rebuilding teams, and shipping Richardson out while he still had the illusion of value was the right thing to do. Conservative fans of the Browns won’t agree, but anyone with foresight can see that the extra first round pick will be a much valuable tool for Cleveland to use in attempting to land a true franchise quarterback)

0-2 Buccaneers (+7.5) over 2-0 PATRIOTS

            Tampa’s defense is legit, but Josh Freeman is atrocious. It will be a third straight ugly Patriots victory.

1-1  RAVENS (+2.5) over 2-0 Texans

            Houston hasn’t looked great in its first two wins, and Baltimore needs a win over a quality opponent to reestablish themselves as contenders.

1-1  COWBOYS (-3.5) over 1-1 Rams

            Dallas’ week two loss wasn’t horrible (for Vegas purposes, they covered the spread). They get back on track against St. Louis.

2-0 SAINTS (-7.5) over 1-1 Cardinals

            Do yourself a favor and bet the over.

1-1  Lions (+1) over 0-2 REDSKINS

           The Washington ship is going down, and it’s going to be Mike Shanahan that eventually pays the price for it. Matthew Stafford could throw for 600 yards in this game if it’s close.

1-1  BENGALS (+3) over 1-1 Packers

           Cincinnati has the right parts to frustrate the Packers offense, and the emergence of Giovanni Bernard adds an element of explosiveness missing since Corey Dillon’s prime.

0-2 Giants (-1.5) over 0-2 PANTHERS

            In what is essentially an elimination game, we think the Giants take care of business.

2-0 DOLPHINS (-2) over 1-1 Falcons

            It feels weird to bet on Miami when they are favored in this type of match up, but their defense is strong enough to exploit the weaknesses along the Falcons offensive line.

1-1  49ERS (-10) over 1-1 Colts

           After last Sunday’s stink bomb in Seattle, this is not the week to catch the 49ers. They are going to be pretty pissed off.

2-0 SEAHAWKS (-20) over 0-2 Jaguars

            20-point spreads are normally reserved for college games, but in all seriousness, how high would this spread have to be for you to consider taking Jacksonville?

1-1  Bills (+2.5) over 1-1 JETS

            This feels like the weirdest line of the week. I think Buffalo is significantly better than the Jets.

0-2 STEELERS (+2.5) over 2-0 Bears

            I’ve written how I’m not crazy about the Steelers, but they have enough pride to not get embarrassed two weeks in a row in primetime.

2-0 BRONCOS (-16) over 1-1 Raiders

            This spread probably should’ve been in the 20-point range too.

            Ethan finished two games behind me last week, but still is off to a solid 19-12-1 start. Here are his picks.

Baltimore - I think we see a heavy dose of Bernard Peirce and he shows up big time.

Carolina - Eli is on pace to throw like 60 INTs
Green Bay - I like the direction the Bengals are going but Andy Dalton holds them back from this win.
St. Louis - This will be a hard nose game and Dallas will find a way to lose it.
Minnesota - I can’t remember ever watching Hoyer play and I don’t know who is playing running back for Cleveland so yeah.
Tampa Bay - I don’t get how New England is a 8.5 point favorite, maybe Vegas knows that most Pats fans are too die hard to even pick another team to cover against them.
Arizona - New Orleans struggled to score last week, I like Arizona here.
Tennessee - I have picked Tennessee to win or cover both games this season I am sticking with them.
Detroit - Detroit has to score early in this one. If they can get a quick 10-0 lead, I like their chances.
Atlanta - Without Steven Jackson they are going to air the shit out of the ball.
Buffalo - EJ Manuel looks a lot better than Geno Shit
San Francisco - That is a huge spread but I ain’t scared.
Seattle - The spread could be 28 and I would probably still take Seattle
Chicago - Pittsburgh sucks and I love it.
Denver - People will be scared at half time, but Peyton will score 21 unanswered in the second half.
 

My Week 2 Record = 11-5

Ethan’s Week 2 = 9-7
My Season Record = 16-15-1
Ethan’s Record = 19-12-1
Mine and Ethan’s Thursday Pick = 1-0

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (9/13-9/15)

10. NASCAR Adds Jeff Gordon to The Chase Field
            NASCAR has made up enough rules on the fly, so adding another car to the playoffs isn’t really a huge deal.

9. New York Jets Place Mark Sanchez on IR

            Unfortunately for Jets fans, Sanchez wasn’t permanently placed there.

8. Floyd Mayweather Wins Again

            It’s tempting to bet against Mayweather, but you always have to remember that he never loses.

7. Alabama Outlasts Texas A&M
            At least Johnny Football covered the spread.

6. Matt Kenseth Wins 12-Hour Marathon at Chicago

            Kenseth backing up his top-seed is certainly noteworthy, but the bigger deal is Kyle Busch finishing second. Busch has annually crapped his pants in the opening event of the playoffs, so for him to get off to a solid start is huge.

5. Peyton Punks Eli Again
            Tom Brady is Rock, Peyton Manning is Scissors, and Eli is Paper. I swear that makes sense.

4. Rookie Receiver DeAndre Hopkins Lifts Texans to Overtime Victory

            Houston has been looking for a compliment to Andre Johnson for years. When Johnson went down with a concussion, Hopkins had his coming out party.

3. Seahawks Pound 49ers

            There isn’t a more valuable twelfth man in THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE than the home crowd in Seattle. San Francisco never had a chance Sunday night.

2. Boston Red Sox Honor The Hammer of God, Complete Sweep of Yankees
            Say what you want about the Boston Red Sox, but no one handles pre-game ceremonies better than them. Their tribute to Mariano Rivera, complete with a comedic tribute to his blown saves in the 2004 ALCS, was perfect.

1. E.J. Manuel Leads Stunning Buffalo Bills Comeback     

            Not a lot of nice things happen athletically for the people of Buffalo, so we at No Credentials are always happy when something pleasant happens. There’s a chance that E.J. Manuel is the real deal.

Week 2 NFL Picks

           My picks were mostly terrible last week (unless you ignored the spreads and played the money line), but at least we offered a second set of picks that went 10-5-1 last week.

San Diego Chargers (0-1) @ Philadelphia Eagles (1-0)

Sunday, 1pm, CBS, O/U 55.5
            San Diego was solid for three quarters against one of the AFC’s elite teams, so I’m not ready to sign off on Philly being favored by more than three points against them.

Chargers (+7) over EAGLES

 

Cleveland Browns (0-1) @ Baltimore Ravens (0-1)

Sunday, 1pm, CBS, O/U 43.5
            This is a rough match-up for Cleveland, who catch Baltimore the week after they got humiliated in prime time, and the same day that Ravens are raising their Super Bowl banner.

RAVENS (-7) over Browns

 

Tennessee Titans (1-0) @ Houston Texans (1-0)

Sunday, 1pm, CBS, O/U 43
            One of the few things I had right last week was Tennessee’s improved offensive line making a difference. They didn’t run wild against the Steelers, but did just enough to maintain field position and keep Jake Locker upright. If the defense shows up for a second straight week, the Titans could establish themselves as a dark horse playoff contender.

Titans (+9.5) over TEXANS

 

Miami Dolphins (1-0) @ Indianapolis Colts (1-0)

Sunday, 1pm, CBS, O/U 43.5
            Lost in the shuffle of week 1 were the Colts nearly suffering a horrendous home loss against Oakland, who most experts regarded as the NFL’s worst team heading into the season. 

Dolphins (+3) over COLTS

Carolina Panthers (0-1) @ Buffalo Bills (0-1)

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 43.5
            We’ll combine Carolina attempting to bounce back from a tough home loss with Buffalo dealing with the disappointment of a blown lead against New England as reason to believe the Panthers will cover. To be honest, I considered flipping a coin for this one.

Panthers (-3) over BILLS

St. Louis Rams (1-0) @ Atlanta Falcons (0-1)

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 47.5
            Even with a hobbled Roddy White (thanks for announcing that he had a high ankle sprain before I drafted him on one of fantasy teams, assholes), Atlanta is too good to fall to 0-2.     

FALCONS (-6.5) over Rams

Washington Redskins (0-1) @ Green Bay Packers (0-1)

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 50.5
            Ditto for this game. Aaron Rodgers is going to eat the Redskins secondary for lunch.

PACKERS (-7.5) over Redskins

 

Dallas Cowboys (1-0) @ Kansas City Chiefs (1-0)

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 46.5
            Andy Reid historically was usually the winner whenever his Eagles faced the Cowboys (granted most of those Cowboys teams stunk in the early ‘00s, but whatever), and we’re forecasting the same thing here. This game could be Kansas City’s coming out party.

CHIEFS (-3) over Cowboys

 

Minnesota Vikings (0-1) @ Chicago Bears

Sunday, 1pm, FOX, O/U 42
            Blaine Gabbert was the clear winner of “most inept week 1 quarterback”, but coming in a distant second place was Christian Ponder. I think Chicago does whatever they want too in this one.

BEARS (-6.5) over Vikings

 

New Orleans Saints (1-0) @ Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-1)

Sunday, 4pm, FOX, O/U 48
            I don’t get this line. I really don’t. Go ahead and mortgage your house on the Saints.

Saints (-4) over BUCCANEERS

 

Detroit Lions (1-0) @ Arizona Cardinals (0-1)

Sunday, 4pm, FOX, O/U 48.5
            Detroit looked really good in Week 1, but that could just be because the Vikings suck. Not willing to invest on the road yet until I see them do it.

CARDINALS (+2.5) over Lions

 

Jacksonville Jaguars (0-1) @ Oakland Raiders (0-1)

Sunday, 430pm, CBS, O/U 40
            It’s a shame we couldn’t of scheduled this game for Week 16 so both teams could try to out tank each other on the same field to get the #1 overall pick. It feels ridiculous to take the Raiders when they are favored by anything more than three points (or for that matter, taking the Raiders when they are favored period), but betting on the Jaguars on the road was even scarier until Chad Henne was announced as the Week 2 starter. I don’t know what the over/under for turnovers is, but you’d be wise to bet the over.

Jaguars (+6) over RAIDERS

Denver Broncos (1-0) @ New York Giants (0-1)

Sunday, 430pm, CBS, O/U 56
            On the surface this looks like the classic “we underestimated the Giants but then they won by two touchdowns” kind of game, but this is as flawed a Giants roster as we’ve seen since 2006.

Broncos (-4) over GIANTS

San Francisco 49ers (1-0) @ Seattle Seahawks (1-0)

Sunday, 830pm, NBC, O/U 45
            I think the 49ers are the better team, but it’s irresponsible to bet against Seattle at home.

SEAHAWKS (-2.5) over 49ers

Pittsburgh Steelers (0-1) @ Cincinnati Bengals (0-1)

Monday, 830pm, ESPN, O/U 40.5
            If the Titans shut down Pittsburgh, what are they going to do against the Bengals? Cincinnati might only have to put up 14 points to cover this spread.

BENGALS (-7) over Steelers

 

            Ethan was too busy to type explanations this week, but here are his picks for the rest of Week 2. We were missing his Monday night pick at press time, so we’ll add that via Facebook as soon as it’s available.

Chargers

Ravens
Titans
Colts
Panthers
Falcons
Packers
Cowboys
Bears
Saints
Lions
Raiders
Broncos
49ers
 

My Week 1 Record = 5-10-1

Ethan’s Week 1 = 10-5-1
My Thursday Pick = 1-0
Ethan’s Thursday = 1-0

Patriots-Jets Pick

     An older gentleman came into my store today, and I'll paraphrase what he told me.

I've been gambling on sports for over 30 years, and let me tell you something. If you have a $1,000 lying around, and want to turn it into more, bet on the Jets at +12.5 tomorrow night.

     The weirdest part about this conversation was I didn't even ask about the game, the betting line, or anything. It's like a prophet was sent into my place of work to help make an accurate prediction.

(EDITORS NOTE: Friend of the blog Ethan Hedrick, who stomped me in football picks during Week 1, didn't have the benefit of speaking to an old man, but he too is taking the Jets).

Jets (+11.5) over PATRIOTS

2013 Chase for the Sprint Cup Predictions

            It’s bee one of the weirdest seasons in NASCAR history (punctuated by Michael Waltrip Racing’s dishonorable manipulation of the regular season finale. Good luck with no sponsors next year asshole), which has led to one of the more eclectic Chase fields in recent memory. We break down the 12-car field, plus discuss three bonus drivers who woulda-shoulda-coulda been in The Chase. 
 

He’d Be In The Chase, But He Broke His Leg

15. Tony Stewart - #14 Mobil/Bass Pro Shops Chevrolet – Stewart Haas Racing

            The 3-time champion (and the only man to win under the old and new points system) wasn’t a shoe-in for The Chase, but likely would’ve ended up with the second wildcard spot if it wasn’t for breaking his leg in a sprint car accident. He wouldn’t have been a favorite to win the title, but everyone (including Tony Stewart) was saying the same thing before his improbable 2011 run.
 

The Real Victim

14. Jeff Gordon - #24 – Hendrick Motorsports

            Lost in all the discussion about Ryan Newman replacing Martin Truex Jr. in The Chase is Jeff Gordon, who at the time of caution Saturday night was tenth in points, which would’ve secured a spot in The Chase. Don’t be surprised if we get a repeat of last November’s race at Phoenix multiple times during The Chase.

 

It Wasn’t His Fault

13. Martin Truex Jr. - #56 Napa Toyota – Michael Waltrip Racing

            Maybe Truex knew there was a plan before the race to help get him in. Maybe he didn’t. Regardless, he drove his ass off to keep Jeff Gordon behind him in the closing laps, and didn’t appear to have any knowledge of why the caution came out. His team deserved the penalty, but it sucks for the driver who had nothing to do with bringing out the caution.
   

Karma is a Bitch

12. Clint Bowyer - #15 5-Hour Energy Toyota – Michael Waltrip Racing

Tied for 8^th in Chase Seeding With 0 Wins
            The only person happy with Clint Bowyer is Kyle Busch, and that’s because there’s finally someone that NASCAR fans will boo louder than him during pre-race introductions.

Happy to Be Here

11. Greg Biffle - #16 3M Ford – Roush Fenway Racing

Tied for 6^th in Chase Seeding With 1 Win
            Roush is going to put all of its eggs in the Carl Edwards basket.

10. Dale Earnhardt Jr. - #88 AMP Energy Chevrolet – Hendrick Motorsports

Tied for 8^th in Chase Seeding With 0 Wins
            Not since the inaugural Chase has Dale Earnhardt Jr. been relevant in it. We don’t forecast anything different this year.

9. Kurt Busch - #78 Furniture Row Chevrolet – Furniture Row Racing

Tied for 8^th in Chase Seeding With 0 Wins
            Kurt making it in with Furniture Row Racing will be the second most impressive thing accomplished in NASCAR this season, only topped by whoever wins the title.
 

Punchers Chance at Making Noise

8. Kasey Kahne - #5 Farmers Insurance Chevrolet – Hendrick Motorsports

Tied For 8^th in Chase Seeding With Wildcard Entry
            Flopping from one of the fastest cars onto the track to hovering around mid-pack from week to week is not a formula for success. It’s not impossible for Kahne to string together ten solid races in a weakened Chase field, but we won’t bet on it.

7. Kevin Harvick - #29 Budweiser Chevrolet – Richard Childress Racing
Tied For 4^th in Chase Seeding With 2 Wins
            We’ll stand behind our theory we applied last season to Matt Kenseth about a lame duck driver not having a chance in The Chase.

6. Ryan Newman - #39 Quicken Loans/Outback Steakhouse Chevrolet – Stewart Haas Racing

Tied For 8^th in Chase Seeding With Wildcard Entry
            He’s riding a solid wave of one part momentum and one part good will, but he won’t be able to avoid the lame duck stink in the end.

5. Joey Logano - #22 Shell-Pennzoil Ford – Penske Racing
Tied For 6^th in Chase Seeding With 1 Win
            Throw out his middling performance at Richmond (which thankfully, is a type of track he won’t see in The Chase) and Logano was the hottest driver during the month of August. He’ll have speed at the 1.5 milers, but you should expect some inexperience to bite him in the end.
 

The Favorites

4. Matt Kenseth - #20 Home Depot Toyota – Joe Gibbs Racing

1^st in Chase Seeding With 5 Wins
            Throw out his Bristol win, and it’s been a fairly ordinary summer for Kenseth. He’ll be in the mix, but needs to recapture his early season form to win the championship.

3. Jimmie Johnson - #48 Lowe’s Chevrolet – Hendrick Motorsports

Tied For 2^nd in Chase Seeding With 4 Wins
            Jimmie Johnson’s last four finishes of 28th or worse are not fooling me. Johnson will be in the mix until Homestead.

2. Carl Edwards - #99 Subway/Fastenal/UPS/Kellogg’s Ford – Roush Fenway Racing

Tied For 4^th in Chase Seeding With 2 Wins
            Quietly, Edwards was the point’s leader at the end of the NASCAR regular season. In a diminished Chase field, a consistent ten races might be enough for Cousin Carl to win his first championship.

 

The Favorite  

1. Kyle Busch - #18 M&Ms Toyota – Joe Gibbs Racing

Tied For 2^nd in Chase Seeding With 4 Wins
            I get it. Busch has never done anything in The Chase. In fact, it’s been mostly embarrassing. However, he has too much talent, and among the favorites, the most momentum after a solid summer. There’s no Tony Stewart, Denny Hamlin, Jeff Gordon, or Brad Keselowski to deal with. If he out performs the three drivers we just mentioned, it’s his championship. He normally flames out early in The Chase, so it won’t take long to see if our prediction is correct.

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (9/6-9/8)

10. Jaguars Put Up Two Points Against Kansas City
            As if there was any doubt which club I’m doing my Madden franchise with this season (I pick the worst team), Jacksonville sealed the deal with a turd-sandwich in their home debut.

9. Some Guy Named Yusmeiro Petit Almost Throws a Perfect Game

            Here’s reason number 56,893 why MLB was better when everyone was on steroids.

8. Serena Williams Wins Fifth U.S. Open

            At some point, she has to stop winning majors, right?

7. New York Jets Gift-Wrapped Season Opening Victory Over Tampa Bay
            There wasn’t a more unimpressive team in Week 1 than the pathetic Tampa Bay Buccaneers, who ended up with third and 35 on their opening series. Josh Freeman’s days under center are numbered.

6. Miami Hurricanes Upset #12 Florida

            College football is way more interesting when The U is relevant.

5. Clint Bowyer Intentionally Spins Out, Removing Jeff Gordon and Ryan Newman From The Chase

(EDITORS NOTE: The following is the paragraph I had written immediately following the conclusion of Saturday night’s race at Richmond)

            I have a confession to make…I spun out several times in NASCAR Thunder 2000 to bring out cautions. I don’t feel great about it, but it’s great to come clean, and at least I didn’t cost two guys a spot in the NASCAR playoffs.

            That paragraph still stands, except NASCAR showed some massive balls and penalized Michael Waltrip Racing late Monday night. The previous link sums up the story pretty well, but I’ll say what it didn’t say… Michael Waltrip is a cheat, a scoundrel, a scumbag, and a dumbass.

4. Cowboys Win Bizarre Season Opener Against Giants

            It wasn’t pretty, but Dallas finally beat New York in their new building.

3. Eminem is Interviewed By Brent Musberger on Live Television
            We’ll let the raw video do the talking here.

 

2. 49ers Beat Green Bay Again

            Green Bay shouldn’t hang their heads after their performance Sunday, but the bottom line is San Francisco is the toughest team to fight in the trenches.    

1. Patriots Get a Push, Still Pull Out Win in Buffalo

            New England’s offense was dynamic when Danny Amendola was on the field, and mediocre when he was off of it. They’ll be a force if they can ever get him and Rob Gronkowski healthy at the same time.

Week 1 NFL Picks

            Last year, Week 1 destroyed No Credentials. A 3-13 stink bomb set us behind the eight ball early. This year, we’re not off to a good start (although I stand behind my opening night pick. Wasn’t my fault one of Baltimore’s two competent receivers was run into by his own guy on a punt, or that Peyton Manning went bonkers. Nevermind, it was my fault. You never bet against Peyton Manning at night), but the rest of the Week 1 will be better. Why? Well…I don’t know.
            As a special treat for No Credentials readers (all six of you), we invited friend of the blog Ethan Hedrick to also make picks every week (EDITORS NOTE: Actually, he invited himself, but I figured it wasn’t a bad idea. Instead of one person posting bad picks, why not two?). His picks will be listed below mine. He claims to have picked Denver in his office pool, so we’ll spot him a 1-0 lead.
            Without further ado, the rest of my shitty Week 1 picks.
 

New England Patriots (-10.5) @ Buffalo Bills

Sunday, 1:00pm, CBS, O/U 51
            New England ran for approximately 1,253 yards in the two games they played against Buffalo last year. Throw in a few E.J. Manuel turnovers and this one will be a runaway.

Patriots (-10.5) over BILLS
 

Tennessee Titans (+7) @ Pittsburgh Steelers

Sunday, 1:00pm, CBS, O/U 42
            I wrote in the preseason how I had a good feeling about Tennessee’s improved offensive line. Throw in a retooling Steelers team, and we’re signing off on this game staying within a touchdown.

Titans (+7) over STEELERS

 

Atlanta Falcons (+3) @ New Orleans Saints

Sunday, 1:00pm, FOX, O/U 56
            New Orleans was a team I never picked correctly last season, and I expect this year to be no different. On paper, the Falcons offense shreds the Saints.

Falcons (+3) over SAINTS

 

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (-4.5) @ New York Jets

Sunday, 1:00pm, FOX, O/U 39.5
            A line that feels at least two points too low, but your getting a Josh Freeman discount.

Buccaneers (-4.5) over JETS

Kansas City Chiefs (-4.5) @ Jacksonville Jaguars

Sunday, 1:00pm, CBS, O/U 42
            The obvious rebound team faces one of the obvious worst teams in the league. The longer Blaine Gabbert is involved, the longer Jacksonville should be wagered against any time you’re getting less than a touchdown.

Chiefs (-4.5) over JAGUARS

 

Cincinnati Bengals (+3) @ Chicago Bears

Sunday, 1:00pm, CBS, O/U 42.5
            One of the more difficult match ups to predict, we’ll bet on home field advantage as our tiebreaker.

BEARS (-3) over Bengals

Miami Dolphins (+1.5) @ Cleveland Browns

Sunday, 1:00pm, CBS, O/U 41
            Here’s your under bet of the week, for those of you who love cheering against points.

Dolphins (+1.5) over BROWNS

 

Seattle Seahawks (-4) @ Carolina Panthers

Sunday, 1:00pm, FOX, O/U 45
            Your “No Credentials Upset of the Week That is Destined to Fail”, sponsored by Microsoft.

PANTHERS (+4) over Seahawks

 

Minnesota Vikings (+6) @ Detroit Lions

Sunday, 1:00pm, FOX, O/U 47
            I’m not sold on the Vikings, but any team coached by Jim Schwartz doesn’t deserve to be favored by more than three points.

Vikings (+6) over LIONS

 

Oakland Raiders (+10.5) @ Indianapolis Colts

Sunday, 1:00pm, CBS, O/U 47
            Oakland is atrocious. Absolutely atrocious.

COLTS (-10.5) over Raiders

 

Arizona Cardinals (+4.5) @ St. Louis Rams

Sunday, 4:30pm, FOX, O/U 41.5
            Carson Palmer will put up some stats, but he will also get sacked seven times.

RAMS (-4.5) over Cardinals

Green Bay Packers (+5.5) @ San Francisco 49ers

Sunday, 4:30pm, FOX, O/U 49
            San Francisco isn’t a good place to show up and play when you have a banged up offensive line.

49ERS (-5.5) over Packers

 

New York Giants (+3.5) @ Dallas Cowboys

Sunday, 8:30pm, NBC, O/U 50
            Eli Manning is undefeated in Jerry-World, but the run has to end eventually. Dallas has more talent, and fortunately no one is injured yet.

COWBOYS (-3.5) over Giants

 

Philadelphia Eagles (+4.5) @ Washington Redskins

Monday, 7:00pm, ESPN, O/U 52.5
            I don’t feel great either way about this game, but even if Kirk Cousins gets involved at some point, the Eagles defense is bad enough for Washington to cover.

REDSKINS (-4.5) over Eagles

Houston Texans (-5.5) @ San Diego Chargers

Monday, 10:20pm, ESPN, O/U 45
            Weird stuff usually happens in the second Monday night game during Week 1, but normally the game doesn’t feature a contending team. Houston has it’s flaws, but the defense is stout enough to hold the Chargers in check.

Texans (-5.5) over CHARGERS

Ethan’s Picks

Bill’s cover, combined rushing attempts 100.

Tennessee, and they win because Pittsburgh’s O-line sucks.
New Orleans, they are like 11-2 against the dirty birds.
Tampa Bay, Jets are already fighting Oakland for #1 pick.
KC, Blaine Gabbert is pretty fun to watch.
Bengals, Cutler is too much of a gunslinger for a west coast offense.
Browns, in Weeden I trust.
Seattle, by 20.
Adrian Peterson, I refuse to call them the Vikings (to cover).
Oakland barely covers because they have to ensure a loss to keep pace with the Jets.
St. Louis, but who cares in that division.
San Fran, by 2 TDs
NYG, Dallas has yet to prove they can beat these guys in their own stadium.  Lose by a TD.
Philly, RGIII is exposed quickly
Houston, J.J. Watt kills someone.
 

Thursday Pick = 0-1

Ethan’s Thursday Pick = 1-0

Ravens-Broncos Pick

Baltimore Ravens (+7.5) @ Denver Broncos
Thursday, 8:30pm, NBC

     If Von Miller was slated to play, I'd be all over Denver winning by double digits. Without him though, Joe Flacco will have all day to throw. I won't sign off on the Ravens winning, but expect a high scoring game that stays within a touchdown when it's all said and done.

Ravens (+7.5) over BRONCOS

Final Quick NFL Division Predictions

            No Credentials has been busy relocating its headquarters over the last week, so we’d like to quickly post our final division predictions. We’ll get back on a normal schedule soon, but without further ado, our predictions for both western divisions and the NFC North.
 

NFC North

4. Detroit Lions (3-13)

            Matthew Stafford will rebound, but this is still a horribly coached team.

3. Minnesota Vikings (6-10)

            No runningback has ever followed up a 2,000-yard season with another 2,000-yard season. Unfortunately, that’s what the Vikings need from Adrian Peterson to make the playoffs.

2. Green Bay Packers (10-6)

            They might be the most dangerous NFC playoff team, but there’s quite a few holes on the offensive line for me to endorse a dominant regular season run.

1. Chicago Bears (12-4)

            Thanks to a more imaginative offense, Jay Cutler might have the chance to throw more than 60% of his passes to someone not named Brandon Marshall this season. It doesn’t hurt that Cutler is also playing for a new contract. He could be 2013’s Joe Flacco.
 

AFC West

4. Oakland Raiders (2-14)

            The roster is comically bad, but at least they are looking to the future instead of trying to put lipstick on a pot-bellied pig.

3. San Diego Chargers (5-11)

            Two years ago, Philip Rivers was going in the fourth round of fantasy drafts. How the mighty have fallen.

2. Kansas City Chiefs (10-6)

            The NFL’s most obvious candidate to rebound from a dismal 2012, Kansas City actually has the talent to live up to the hype. Four games against the Raiders and Chargers doesn’t hurt their cause.

1. Denver Broncos (12-4)

            Losing Von Miller hurts (that’s a Troy Aikman-esque statement if I’ve ever seen one), but there’s too much talent on offense. Peyton Manning is a top-5 MVP candidate.
 

NFC West

4. Arizona Cardinals (6-10)

            At least Larry Fitzgerald will be relevant in fantasy this season.

3. St. Louis Rams (8-8)

            St. Louis is loaded with solid young talent, but they are still a year or two away from making a run in the loaded NFC West.

2. Seattle Seahawks (10-6)

            Injuries along the defensive line could make an elite defense look mediocre for the early part of the season.

1. San Francisco 49ers (13-3)

            Other than Vernon Davis, there aren’t a whole lot of options for Colin Kaepernick to throw too until Michael Crabtree returns from injury. Thankfully, there’s enough talent along the offensive line and defense to overcome it.