10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (3/14-3/16)

10. It Sucks (sort of) Being a NFL Runningback
            Somewhere in an alternate universe where movies are reality, Coach Kilmer from “Varsity Blues” was smiling after Ben Tate only inked a two-year, $7 million deal with Cleveland.

9. Kids Die on “The Walking Dead”

            While it was definitely disturbing television last night, we applaud “The Walking Dead” for taking the story in a direction only a handful of shows in television history would ever go.

8. Patriots Actually Resign a Wide Receiver

            Julian Edelman is a nice re-sign, but I’m sure Tom Brady would’ve rather seen New England make this decision last year with Wes Welker.

7. Phil Jackson Signs on to Run New York Knicks
            We’re not sure how many days Jackson will actually spend in New York, but at this point in his career I’m sure he can run a NBA organization like it’s a fantasy team. At the very least, it will be high comedy to watch J.R. Smith try to learn the triangle offense.

6. Julius Peppers Lands on His Feet, Joins Green Bay Packers

            Who says Green Bay won’t open the checkbook in free agency? I’m not sure how Peppers (who’s always been a 4-3 defensive end) fits in a 3-4 scheme, but he is athletic enough to play as a rush linebacker.

5. Carl Edwards Wins Rain-Ravaged Food City 500

            Here’s an idea NASCAR, let’s run races in only the west coast, southwest, or Florida until April. At least Cousin Carl earned a ticket to the playoffs in this farce of a Sprint Cup event.

4. Pacers Pull Off 25-Point Comeback, Win in Overtime at Detroit

            Like many of the NBA superpowers in recent weeks, the Pacers had been in a bit of a funk. Perhaps a furious comeback (it still counts, even if it came against a team built by Joe Dumars) will right them for the stretch run.
         
3. Rich Peverley Returns to Watch the Dallas Stars Face Calgary
            Considering that Peverley technically died for a few seconds the last time he was on the ice, it was awesome to see him back at the arena. Here’s to the former Bruin having a speedy recovery, and making a return to NHL competition in the near future.
          
2. Anthony Davis Goes Bonkers Against Boston
            One of the few proclamations No Credentials has ever been right about was The Brow’s potential to be the next Kevin Garnett. He went into beast mode against the Celtics Sunday night.
 
1. Florida, Arizona, Wichita State, Virginia Nab #1 Seeds
            We don’t want to spoil too much of our billion dollar winning bracket, so check back with us tomorrow or Wednesday for our “expert” analysis.

State of the Lakers

            As someone who predicted Los Angeles to crush the Mavericks in five games, I couldn’t of been more surprised how the Lakers folded like a lawn chair against Dallas. Now that the dust has settled for a couple of days, let’s look at the key components of the Lakers and figure out where they go from here.

Derek Fisher, PG – Fisher’s basketball career needs to be put down like a dying dog. The offense the Lakers run doesn’t require much ball handling from the point guard, but they desperately need some speed and defense at the 1 (Lakers fans shouldn’t expect either of those traits to ever come from Steve Blake). Here’s a quick list of potential free agents that they might be able to sign for a low-risk contract.

Delonte West (BOS)

Jose Juan Barea (DAL, would make a ton of sense after Barea destroyed them during the sweep)

T.J. Ford (IND)

Anthony Carter (NY)

Ron Artest, SF – Los Angeles would’ve been much happier with acquiring Artest if they had done in it 2003 as opposed to 2009. He still has instincts on defense, but no longer has the speed to hang with athletic wings. Sadly for Lakers fans, he’s going to be owed another $22 million for the next three years. The best-case scenario would be forcing a club that wants Bynum or Gasol to take Artest along with him.

Lamar Odom, SF/PF – On one hand, Odom is a skilled big-man who can handle the ball and pound the boards. On the other, he’s starring in a reality show with a Kardashian. In spite of the television shenanigans, he should be a player they keep going forward. His versatility is much to valuable to give away in a panic trade.

Andrew Bynum, C – Supposedly, Bynum has the talent to develop into a franchise center. If I’m the Lakers, I’m calling Orlando everyday until a trade for Dwight Howard is in place (the worst kept secret in the NBA is that Howard wants to join the Lakers either via trade or as a free agent after next season).

Pau Gasol, PF/C – If internet rumor sites are to believed, a fellow Laker encouraging Pau’s girlfriend to break up with Pau is the reason for Gasol’s struggles in the playoffs. If that Laker was anyone that doesn’t have the last name of “Bryant”, I would be shipping that Laker out of town ASAP. Gasol is too gifted an offensive player to be discarded for 25 cents on the dollar.

Kobe Bryant, SG – Here’s two things I can definitively say after watching Bryant play for the past month.

1. Bryant no longer has the ability to consistently get to the rim.
2. He ain’t no Jordan (this should be obvious, but I’ll say it for die-hard Lakers fans. MJ never would’ve let his team quit like they did in Game 4 against the Mavericks. Or for that matter, Game 6 of the 2008 Finals against Boston).

             Bryant still has life in him. No one will benefit from the upcoming lockout more than him (after the NBA Finals, there probably will not be a NBA game until January). The biggest question for him will be if he accepts being the second best player on a team that also could feature Dwight Howard within a year or two.

Phil Jackson, Head Coach – Phil is going to be smoking tons of pot in Montana. Unless the Knicks offer him $50 million to coach for the 2012-13 season, we’ll never see the Zen Master on the bench again.