Super Bowl XLIX Thoughts

            We’re going to list our Super Bowl observations in bullets, because why have organized, coherent thoughts in essay form?

-         Folks need to pump the brakes before anointing Super Bowl XLIX the greatest Super Bowl ever. It was certainly the most unbelievable ending I can think of (advanced metrics gave Seattle an 88% chance of winning when they had second and goal on the one yard line), but in terms of historical significance, others were more important. People don’t remember how big of a deal it was when John Elway won his first Super Bowl against Green Bay. Also, the Patriots were on their way to an undefeated season seven years ago when this happened.

-         I’m not sure what was more shocking, Seattle throwing on second and goal or Walter White showing up in a commercial. My jaw dropped for both events.

-         Speaking of commercials, I have a question for ad executives across America…

-         Off hand I remember four that emphasized fatherhood, a beer ad about a lost puppy, and the NFL’s too-little-too-late attempt to pretend they care about women with their “No More” campaign. None of those ads topped Nationwide Insurance’s critically panned ad where they had a ten year old say “BUT I DIED”. We need to bring back the Budweiser Frogs for Super Bowl 50.

-         Pepsi should’ve started slipping LSD into 20-ounce bottles so soda drinkers across the country could’ve better appreciated Katy Perry’s halftime show.

-         Lenny Kravitz was supposed to be Perry’s supporting act, and he was on stage for roughly 80 seconds. Weird.

-         The best decision of the night goes to NBC for deciding not to show a replay of Seattle cornerback Jeremy Lane snapping his wrist in half.

-         Speaking of that, that was what turned the game in favor of Tom Brady and the Patriots. The Seahawks don’t have the same depth at corner they had against Denver last year, and they simply ran out of guys to cover Julian Edelman, Danny Amendola, and Shane Vereen.

-         Tom Brady is a damn good quarterback, but we’re still taking Joe Montana over him as the greatest Super Bowl QB of all time.

-         It will be very interesting to see how Russell Wilson bounces back from that ghastly interception. Plays like that ruin careers.

-    The dude that made the circus catch for Seattle was on his way to being remembered for making one of the greatest plays in Super Bowl history until the Seahawks forgot they employed Marshawn Lynch.

-         We predicted the Patriots would be playing in the Super Bowl in August. No joke you can read it right here! That’s literally the last quality football prediction I made the rest of the season.

With all that said we bid a sad goodbye to the NFL for seven months. The league’s flaws were certainly exposed over the past 12 months, but a game like Super Bowl XLIX is a reminder of why America is so obsessed with THE NATIONAL FOOTBALL LEAGUE. We look forward to offering up our season previews for 2015 this summer. Until then, hang out with your family (remember football fans, some of you have kids), watch other sports (the NBA is ridiculous right now), or do whatever it takes to fill the void left by the NFL season ending. 

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Weekend (3/14-3/16)

10. It Sucks (sort of) Being a NFL Runningback
            Somewhere in an alternate universe where movies are reality, Coach Kilmer from “Varsity Blues” was smiling after Ben Tate only inked a two-year, $7 million deal with Cleveland.

9. Kids Die on “The Walking Dead”

            While it was definitely disturbing television last night, we applaud “The Walking Dead” for taking the story in a direction only a handful of shows in television history would ever go.

8. Patriots Actually Resign a Wide Receiver

            Julian Edelman is a nice re-sign, but I’m sure Tom Brady would’ve rather seen New England make this decision last year with Wes Welker.

7. Phil Jackson Signs on to Run New York Knicks
            We’re not sure how many days Jackson will actually spend in New York, but at this point in his career I’m sure he can run a NBA organization like it’s a fantasy team. At the very least, it will be high comedy to watch J.R. Smith try to learn the triangle offense.

6. Julius Peppers Lands on His Feet, Joins Green Bay Packers

            Who says Green Bay won’t open the checkbook in free agency? I’m not sure how Peppers (who’s always been a 4-3 defensive end) fits in a 3-4 scheme, but he is athletic enough to play as a rush linebacker.

5. Carl Edwards Wins Rain-Ravaged Food City 500

            Here’s an idea NASCAR, let’s run races in only the west coast, southwest, or Florida until April. At least Cousin Carl earned a ticket to the playoffs in this farce of a Sprint Cup event.

4. Pacers Pull Off 25-Point Comeback, Win in Overtime at Detroit

            Like many of the NBA superpowers in recent weeks, the Pacers had been in a bit of a funk. Perhaps a furious comeback (it still counts, even if it came against a team built by Joe Dumars) will right them for the stretch run.
         
3. Rich Peverley Returns to Watch the Dallas Stars Face Calgary
            Considering that Peverley technically died for a few seconds the last time he was on the ice, it was awesome to see him back at the arena. Here’s to the former Bruin having a speedy recovery, and making a return to NHL competition in the near future.
          
2. Anthony Davis Goes Bonkers Against Boston
            One of the few proclamations No Credentials has ever been right about was The Brow’s potential to be the next Kevin Garnett. He went into beast mode against the Celtics Sunday night.
 
1. Florida, Arizona, Wichita State, Virginia Nab #1 Seeds
            We don’t want to spoil too much of our billion dollar winning bracket, so check back with us tomorrow or Wednesday for our “expert” analysis.