No Credentials Summer Recap

            I wish I had a better excuse as to why No Credentials has been less active over the pass six months, but really it boils down to two things.

1.      I was without Playstation 3 for five months.

      2.      I bought a new one, and play a game of my Madden franchise when before I would be writing blog posts.

To make up for our lack of production, we’ll take a quick peak at stories I briefly thought about tackling before deciding playing another game with my son at quarterback of the Kansas City Chiefs was more exciting.

MLB

Ryan Braun Surrenders

            There’s no other word for it, as Braun defiantly took on MLB for almost two years before essentially accepting a plea deal. One wonders if Braun backed down partially because his team is terrible, and he’s been nursing a sore thumb the past two months that hasn’t improved. He’ll come back with no marketability in 2014, but he will be healthy, and quite possibly a top-10 fantasy asset next season.

Mariano Rivera Wins the All-Star Game MVP

            Evidently, a scoreless eighth is more valuable than a scoreless ninth. This game was further proof of why an All-Star Game should have nothing to do with determining home-field advantage for it’s championship series.

The Yankees Stink

            That statement is a little strong in realistic terms (they are over .500, and would gave a one game lead in the NL West), but compared to the usual excellence produced by the Yankees, it’s an accurate one. The offense is abysmal, only generating 125 less runs this season than the Red Sox have. C.C. Sabathia looks to be in desperate need of a switch the National League, and Alex Rodriguez still hangs over the club like a black cloud. While not supporters of the Bronx Bombers, we here at No Credentials are always fans of roster building, so here’s our on the fly, not well thought out fix for the New York Yankees that they can begin implementing before the trade deadline.

1. Give up on the 2013 season – It would be one thing if they were just seven games behind the Red Sox, but they also trail Tampa Bay and Baltimore (by 6.5 and 4 games). The Rangers and Indians are also ahead of them in the Wild Card standings.
2. Trade Robinson Cano – By all accounts, it appears Cano is going to ask for eleventy billion dollars this winter. If George Steinbrenner were still alive, he would never make it to free agency, but unfortunately for Yankees’ fans his kids aren’t as willing to open up the checkbook. Rather than let him walk in free agency (and only soak up draft picks), they should try to push for a blockbuster trade now. Where could he go you ask? My money if he hits free agency is the Washington Nationals, but you could never count out the Detroit Tigers from making an aggressive trade.      
3. Blackmail Mariano Rivera into returning for the 2014 season – Sure it would be awkward after all of the retirement gifts Rivera has been getting all season (my all-time favorite “retiring” person that ended up not retiring was Mark Martin, who swore up and down 2005 would be his last season, only to return in 2006. He’s still racing a part-time schedule today) if he came back next season, but who cares. I think he could throw that ridiculous cutter until he was 65 years old.
4. Frame A-Rod, Sabathia, and Teixeira for a bank robbery – These guys are earning $75 million (!) combined this season, so coming up with some clever scheme to void their contracts would be advantageous.

NFL

Von Miller Potentially Facing a 4-Game Suspension

            It’s a good thing Miller plays a sport where it’s fans don’t give a shit about statistics, because he will not come back with the same stigma as Ryan Braun.

NBA

The Dwightmare Ends…Howard Chooses Houston

            If I weren’t so addicted to playing my Madden franchise I would’ve dropped a 4,000-word piece about Howard shortly after he joined the Rockets, but you’re going to have to settle for bullet points.

-         Shaq was wrong when he accused Howard of not being able to play in a big city. For one, Dwight was working on a way to weasel his way onto the Clippers to play with his buddy Chris Paul. The last time I checked, the Clippers still play in Los Angeles. Howard leaving the Lakers had more to do with him not wanting to put up with Kobe Bryant than him not being able to handle L.A.

-         Of all the teams that were trying to land Howard, the Rockets were the best fit for him. With Howard in the fold, they are fielding a more athletic version of the Orlando team Dwight carried to the 2009 NBA Finals. Even better for the Rockets, they still have a valuable trade asset in Omer Asik that can be used to improve the roster. You can’t make Houston the clear favorites in the ultra-competitive Western Conference, but they’ll have a reasonable chance at playing for a championship the next two or three years.

-         The Lakers are going to suck balls. It would make tons of sense for them to tank the season like the Celtics are going to do (more on that in the next bullet point), but instead, they’ll field a mediocre team based around a physically limited Kobe Bryant. Pau Gasol should be better utilized, but that won’t be enough for them to be better than .500.

Danny Ainge Blows Up the Celtics

            Is it going to suck watching Paul Pierce (a Celtic since 1997) and Kevin Garnett (the catalyst for the 2008 championship winning team) play for the Nets? Yes. Is it going to suck to watch Doc Rivers coach the Clippers? Yes. The “Ubuntu” Era was responsible for the rebirth of Celtic pride in the northeast, but it was wise to turn the page on this group of players. When you have the chance to land one of five potential franchise players in next year’s draft, the most logical thing to do is to suck as much as humanly possible and improve your lottery chances. The team implosion will be complete if they are able to showcase Rajon Rondo for a 10-game tryout after he returns from injury and then ship him off to a contending (hopefully with Gerald Wallace’s horrendous contract, but that’s probably wishful thinking).

NHL

Bruins Give Up On Seguin

            Because you know, any time you can prematurely give up on a 21-year old phenom, you have to do it. This deal will hurt when Tyler Seguin wins a Hart Trophy in Dallas.

NASCAR

Jimmie Johnson is Better at NASCAR Than Any Other Athlete is at any Other Sport Right Now

            It hasn’t been fair this season. If not for some bad luck with pit stops and restarts, Johnson could very well have eight wins right now. Unless Joe Gibbs Racing finds some durability with their Toyota engines, the Chase for the Cup could be over in eight races.

Life-Plan for the Celtics

            I’ve always been willing to offer people “life plans”. For example, to a foreign student who was looking to stay here in the United States beyond the date of her work visa, I strongly suggested that she find a man who is in the armed forces and marry him. To make a long story short, I’m full of good ideas. Tonight I’d like to propose a pipe-dream plan for how the Boston Celtics should handle their roster before the start of the 2012-13 season. Here’s what GM Danny Ainge and company need to do.

1. Realize You’re Not Winning a Championship This Year

            Even if they get the ship righted and begin playing competitive basketball again, Boston would at best be the sixth best team in the Eastern Conference. Boston's chances of winning a title are about as good as Katy Perry's chances of acing a calculus exam. Ainge has to see that it’s time to try to get this team better in 3-5 years, not right now. Once that’s realized, here’s the first move…

2. Shop Kevin Garnett and Ray Allen at the Trade Deadline

            Both players are in the year of their contracts, so they would be low-risk rentals for whoever acquired them. Garnett especially would provide tons of cap relief for whoever acquired them. If Boston got any kind of package of young players or draft picks for either Garnett or Allen, they should jump on it.

3. Ban Paul Pierce From Eating Fast Food

            I know Pierce dealt with a heel injury before the start of the season, but did that heel prevent him from lifting weights? Paul looks like he should be starting at right guard for the Patriots instead of small forward for the Celtics.

4. Lock Rondo In A Gym For the Entire Summer Until He’s a Consistent 70% or Better Free Throw Shooter

            It’s okay if you’re best player is an abysmal free throw shooter if he’s playing center or power forward. It’s a totally different story when it’s a point guard who’s responsible for the majority of the ball handling. Rondo doesn’t need to hit 3-pointers (look at the Spurs’ Tony Parker for proof of that), but improved free-throw shooting will go along way in giving Rondo the confidence to drive into the lane.

5. Set the Roster Up For a Shot at a Quality Lottery Pick For the 2013 Draft

            Due to the aging roster, Boston is not high on the list for potential free agents. The Celtics will have all sorts of cap-space this summer with Garnett, Allen, and Jermaine O’Neal (‘s dead body) coming off the books, but there’s no chance that Dwight Howard signs with them. When elite-free agents aren’t willing to take your money, the only thing to do is tank and hope for a top-draft pick. The worst thing you can be in the NBA is a .500 team, which is what Boston will be if they continue riding the Big 4.

Status of the Celtics

            Unlike the Lakers, the Celtics fans shouldn’t be completely demoralized. You could argue that if not for Rondo’s elbow injury, they would’ve won both of the final two games of the series (it’s much better to lose when you have a viable excuse, at least in my opinion. If you’re a Lakers fan, you have none because your team just got annihilated). Not to mention that Lebron James credits Boston’s Big Three as the reason he, Wade, and Bosh decided to team up (oh wait, that should make a Celtics fan feel worse. Nevermind). However, with its aging core Boston’s future going forward is very murky. Only Rondo, Paul Pierce, and Avery Bradley are signed on for contracts that are past the 2012 season. Just like I did with Los Angeles a couple of days ago, here is a look at all of the components of the Celtics organization.

Carlos Arroyo, Troy Murphy, Sasha Pavlovic, Von Wafer = I hope none if you invested in one of these players jerseys, because there is a 0% chance they are on the team next year.

Avery Bradley, PG-SG = Bradley didn’t see a second of playing time during the postseason, but he does have some potential. Just two years ago he was the top ranked high school senior in the nation. Expect the Celtics to give him some run as the back-up point guard in the event that Delonte West is not resigned at the beginning of 2011-12.

 

Nenad Krstic, C = Krstic is an unrestricted free agent, but I’m not sure I would let him walk if I was the Celtics. He’s a bit soft, but maybe a full season in KG boot camp could toughen him up.

 

Jermaine O’Neal, C-PF = Jermaine is under contract through the end of next season. The only thing of value he provides to Boston is a just under $6 million expiring contract that could be shipped to another team seeking cap relief (unless Boston hangs on to him so he comes off their books at the end of the season). 

Shaquille O’Neal, C = Shaq has a player option that he would be a fool not to exercise. If he does, he’ll get just under $2 million to miss 65 games with an injury.

Glen Davis, PF = Big Baby’s issues the past couple of months have not been talked about enough. He went from a guy who was a serviceable 6^th man and fill-in at center to a basket case that only averaged 4 points a game in the series against Miami. I’m willing to bet that some team will throw him a four-year, $24 million deal. Baby’s days in Boston are over.

Delonte West, PG-SG = Delonte is an interesting dude. On one hand, he is rumored to have had sexual relations with Lebron’s mom. On the other, he played solid minutes for the Celtics this year when he was healthy. On the other hand, he was once arrested with a guitar case full of guns. I’m hoping that his past episodes allow Boston to be able to resign him at a discounted rate.  

Jeff Green, SF = It was fitting that the backbreaking play of the 2010-11 Celtics season was Jeff Green fumbling the ball out of bounds when Boston was down 90-87. I’m not sure if he’ll ever be a viable option in Boston as long as people are still upset about acquiring him for Kendrick Perkins. Green is a restricted free agent this year, which gives the Celtics the right to match any offer another club makes to him.

Rajon Rondo, PG = Rondo will be in a Celtics uniform for the next four seasons. In order to join the elite group of point guards, Rondo needs to work on mid-range jumper. If he added a steady 18-footer that he was willing to take when he had an open look. Throw that in with improved free throw shooting, and Boston would no longer have to worry about playing 4 on 5 on offense at the end of games. Rondo needs to take his game to the next level for Boston to have any chance to win a championship in the next five years (barring a miracle acquisition of Dwight Howard).

Ray Allen, SG = Just like Shaq, Ray also has an opt out clause that would allow him to be a free agent this summer. Unlike Shaq, it wouldn’t be a terrible idea for him to explore his options. If Allen were smart, he would bolt for Chicago. The Bulls have a glaring hole at shooting guard. Ray Allen would be the perfect compliment to Derrick Rose at shooting guard. Even if his skills degrade, he could drain wide-open 3s for the next five years. If he’s interested in winning more titles, going to the Bulls makes the most sense. However, Allen stated after Game 5 that he would remain with the Celtics.

Paul Pierce, SF = Pierce is under contract for the next three seasons, which could be his last three years in the NBA. His improved efficiency (he almost made half of his field goals during the regular season, and shot a career high 86% from the line) have made him a much more effective player as he has gotten older. Barring injury, he should be able to give the Celtics solid production for the remainder of his contract.

Kevin Garnett, PF = Garnett is under contract through the end of next season. With KG already hinting at retirement during this past year, don’t be surprised if 2012 is the final team we see Garnett on the court. If things go really bad for Garnett next year, his $18 million that he is owed for next season would make for an attractive expiring contract.

Doc Rivers, Head Coach = Doc just inked a new five year contract with Boston. Some of the lineups he through out against Miami was a bit odd (the Rondo-West-Allen-Pierce-Garnett he called upon to play the 4^th quarter in Game 4 being the strangest), but desperation will make you do funny things. Boston should let Doc coach as long as he wants.

Danny Ainge, General Manger = Here’s the list of things that needed to happen in order for Ainge’s decision to trade Kendrick Perkins a good move.

1. Jeff Green needed to go from being the 3^rd option on Oklahoma City to a bench player who gave quality defensive minutes at both small forward and power forward (that didn’t happen).
2. Shaquille O’Neal needed to be healthy for the playoffs and give Boston 20 to 25 solid minutes a night (that didn’t happen).
3. Glen Davis needed to continue his stellar early season play as an undersized center and backup power forward (that didn’t happen).

It’s fair to say that Ainge botched this one. Never in the history of the NBA had a team that was the favorite before the trade deadline butchered its roster so poorly. It would’ve made much more sense for Ainge to hang on to Perkins, make a minor move to acquire a wing player (Corey Brewer would’ve made a ton of sense if Jeff Green hadn’t already been added to the roster), and go into the playoffs as the #1 seed in the East. Hindsight is 20/20, but this is a move that Ainge should regret for a long time.