2014 Stanley Cup Playoff First Round Picks

     For the rare breed that enjoys both basketball and hockey (I'm proudly in this group. No need to hate one or the other in my book), the first half of the best stretch of the sports year begins tomorrow night. We haven't followed hockey as closely since the end of the Olympics, so even more than usual, take these picks with a grain of salt.

Western Conference

#4 San Jose Sharks vs. #5 Los Angeles Kings

            You don’t bet on Sharks in April, unless they are deep in the Pacific Ocean matched up against a manatee. Kings in 6

#3 St. Louis Blues vs. #5 Chicago Black Hawks

            Interesting match-up here, as you have the two top teams from the first two thirds of the season facing off in an unlikely first round match-up. Chicago was ravaged by injuries, but should be back to full strength with Patrick Kane returning to the lineup. How soon he shakes the rust off will determine Chicago’s chance of moving on. St. Louis choked away the Central Division with six straight losses, but teams have sputtered into the postseason before and then turned it on for a deep playoff run. This will be the best series in the West, and we see it going the full seven. Advantage to the team not needing a bunch of injured dudes to return at 100%. Blues in 7

#2 Colorado Avalanche vs. #7 Minnesota Wild

            It’s cool to have Colorado back as a competitive team. Apparently all it took was putting their best players from their hey-day in the late-90s in management gigs (we love Joe Sakic and Patrick Roy, anyway we can get Forsberg involved?) to return the team to relevance. Only Los Angeles scored fewer goals among the remaining playoff teams during the regular season than the Wild, and unfortunately Minnesota doesn’t trot out Johnathan Quick in goal. We think the next generation of Aves take care of business in round 1. Avalanche in 4

#1 Anaheim Ducks vs. #8 Dallas Stars

            The Ducks are solid, and Dallas doesn’t possess the necessary depth on the blue-line to contain them. Tyler Seguin (remember him Bruins fans? He only had a career year this season) is talented enough to steal a game, but Dallas will be lucky to push this to 6. Ducks in 5

Eastern Conference

#5 New York Rangers vs. #6 Philadelphia Flyers

            This shit is going seven games, and New York employing Henrik Lundqvist was the tiebreaker for me. Rangers in 7

#3 Tampa Bay Lightning vs. #4 Montreal Canadiens

            Here’s your best goalie match-up of the first round, with Vezina Trophy candidates Carey Price and Ben Bishop facing off. Tampa Bay’s 2013-14 campaign is criminally underrated, as they were able to hold the fort down even after shipping a disgruntled Martin St. Louis to New York. However, we expect Gold Medal winning goalie Price to stand on his head and steal a Game 7 on the road. Canadiens in 7

#2 Pittsburgh Penguins vs. #7 Columbus Blue Jackets

            Pittsburgh wobbled into the postseason, and Columbus is better than you think after posting the fifth best goal differential in the Eastern Conference. Here’s our upset special. Blue Jackets in 6

#1 Boston Bruins vs. #8 Detroit Red Wings

            At first glance, it looks like a bad draw to end up with the Red Wings in Round 1, but Nicklas Lidstrom isn’t walking through that door. Steve Yzerman isn’t walking through that door. Boston will roll. Bruins in 4

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Past Weekend (4/22-4/24)

10. Playstation 3 Online Network is Shut-Down

            Sadly, 2.5 million gamers had to actually interact with people face to face this weekend.

9. Rich Rodriguez Admits Leaving West Virginia Was Bad Idea

            In related news…

1. Brett Favre admits having an unlimited texting plan was a bad idea.
2. George W. Bush admits becoming the President was a bad idea.
3. Christian Slater admits that his entire career was a bad idea.
4. The Wiggles admit that going on without the original Yellow Wiggle was a bad idea.
5. Led Zeppelin will admit the song “Hot Dog” was a bad idea (if you want audio proof, here you go).

8. Washington Capitals Eliminate Rangers

            After last year’s disappointing ouster by the Canadiens, Washington took care of business against the Rangers. I would also like to point out that I correctly picked the length of this series. I don’t expect a reward for doing this, but I wanted to show some physical evidence that every now and then a blind squirrel would find a nut. 

7. Anibal Sanchez Loses No-Hit Bid in the 9^th Inning Friday

            Sanchez is the first to make it into the 9^th with a no-hit bid this season, but several starters have already gone very deep into games with no hits allowed. Hell, Josh Johnson has gotten into the 6^th inning three times already this season without surrendering a hit. Johnson is a great pitcher (when healthy), but he’s not the second coming of Bob Gibson.

            A few weeks ago I had written about forming a group for Red Sox fans that are against Red Sox Nation, but have come up with a better idea that will benefit all baseball fans. I want to bring steroids back. The main thesis for this movement will be that baseball was much more entertaining when everyone was on the juice. Look for a manifesto for this group to come out within a few weeks.

6. Pacers Win Game 4 Against Bulls

            Indiana has been in every single game in this series, so it was nice to see them pull off a win at home before more than likely losing at Chicago.

              

5. Miami Loses Game 4 to 76ers

            The Heat blew a six-point lead with just over a minute and a half to play in this one. This sort of hiccup won’t keep them from closing out Philadelphia, but similar gags in round 2 against Boston will send them home for the summer in six games or less.

4. Chris Paul’s Triple-Double Helps Hornets Even Series With Lakers           

            No matter what happens the rest of this series, at least we have been given more proof that Chris Paul is the best point guard on planet Earth (that’s right, better than Derrick Rose). Throw in Kobe leaving the arena last night on crutches, and Los Angeles could be in serious trouble. 

3. Grizzlies Take 2-1 Lead Over Spurs

            I’ll keep this short because the two teams are playing as I’m typing this. When you look at the rosters, Memphis beating up on San Antonio isn’t a shock, but to watch San Antonio struggle with the Grizzlies is sort of simple to watching Peyton Manning drag a sub-par Colts team into the playoffs.

2. Brandon Roy Leads Epic Blazers Comeback Over Mavericks

            Portland was down 23 at one point before Roy went bonkers, scoring 18 of his 24 points in the 4^th quarter. Not a lot of east coasters realize this, but the failure of Brandon Roy’s knees has been one of the sadder stories in the NBA (probably #3 behind Yao Ming and Greg Oden). Anonymous sources have indicated that Roy may be lucky to play another two years in the league. It was great to see him party like it was 2007 for one quarter.

1. Bruins Win in Double OT, Take 3-2 Series Lead

            If you watched either Games 4 or 5 of the Boston-Montreal series, and were not thoroughly entertained, than you will never enjoy watching hockey. Both Tim Thomas and Carey Price filled Saturday’s double overtime thriller with game saving saves with startling regularity. I’m pulling for the Bruins, but part of me is hoping Montreal wins Game 6 so we get to watch an epic Game 7.  

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Past Weekend (4/16-4/18)

10. On-Line Poker Shutdown in United States

            I was bummed out when I first read this headline, but now feel better that I will no longer lose pots to 17-year old kids from Argentina who are hitting miracle flushes on the river. On the other hand, I can’t sit in pajamas and play poker in my living room anymore (unless I had a pajama Texas Hold ‘Em party, but that would be weird). It looks like we are moving closer to a world where the US Government will be regulating on-line poker games.

9. Ducks Forward Bobby Ryan Suspended For Stomping On Opponents Skate

            Ryan claims that he wasn’t intentionally stomping on Predators defenseman Jonathon Blum skate during game 2 of the Ducks-Predators series. I’ll refer you to this video so you can decide for yourself (plus, you get to see Barry Melrose and his mullet, which is always a good time).

8. Jimmie Johnson Wins By .002 Seconds at Talladega

            If you didn’t enjoy the last laps of this race, than you will never enjoy any NASCAR event.

7. Durant Drops 41 to Lead Thunder Over Nuggets

            Russell Westbrook chipped in with 31 to carry Oklahoma City in the best shoot out of the game 1s. I really like how Oklahoma City is looking right now. You have two stud scorers, two big men to control the paint (Kendrick Perkins and Serge Ibaka), a stopper on the wing (Thabo Sefolosha), and a very good 6^th man (James Harden). San Antonio or Los Angles will not want to see this team in the 2^nd round.

6. Canadiens Take 2-0 Series Lead Over Bruins

            Boston has now lost six straight postseason games dating back to last season. The Bruins look like they are a stud goal scorer short this year. I wouldn’t be surprised if they still pulled this series out, but anyone who thinks of this team as a Stanley Cup favorite is either a real homer or on drugs (or both).

5. Down 10, Bulls Pull Off 4^th Quarter Comeback Against Pacers

            My Dad actually watched the end of this game (which could be a sign of the apocalypse, because my Dad watches NBA games approximately once every nine years), and he claims that the Bulls were bailed out by the officials in game 1. In honor of him watching the game, I’ll let that stand as my analysis of this event.

4. Hawks Win Game 1 in Orlando

            When your best player scores 46, and you still lose by 10 points, you have serious issues. I’ve said it before, but it’s worth repeating that Orlando has done a horrendous job building a team around Dwight Howard. 12-year olds running a franchise on NBA 2K12 could’ve done a better job.

3. Grizzlies Win First Playoff Game in Franchise History Over Spurs

            In my first round preview, I predicted a sweep by the Spurs, but also predicted Memphis to be in every single game. In my mind, that counts for something. If I was a Spurs fan, I would be very worried if Ginobili cannot return at anything less than 100%. 

2. Chris Paul Goes Bonkers, Leads Hornets to Game 1 Upset of Lakers

            On paper, it made a lot of sense that Chris Paul would destroy Derek Fisher in this series. Paul is one of the best three point guards in the league, and Derek Fisher has been washed-up for five years. However, it was very surprising that the Lakers were not able to lock down the rest of the Hornets. Expect a better game plan from the Lakers in Game 2. They won’t shut down Paul, but if they can keep him under 10 assists, they will be fine. Pau Gasol showing up will also help (only 8 points for him on 2-8 shooting).

1. Ray Allen From Downtown…BANG

            Boston was terrible in the first half, but found some life after halftime. I’m predicting a double-digit Celtics win in game 2, which is a lock if Chauncey Billups can’t play after injuring his knee late in game 1.

Uninformed 1st Round Stanley Cup Playoff Picks

            As I’ve aged, hockey and I have steadily grown apart. I didn’t mean for it to happen, but with the 2004-05 lockout, and the difficulty in finding a game that involved two teams other than the Bruins, it’s been a very hard league to follow the last five years.

When I first moved into my own apartment, I was able to purchase the Time Warner Digital Cable package, and for the first time, was able to watch Versus. This led to a torrid affair between the Stanley Cup Playoffs and myself for the first time since Martin St.Louis led the Lightning to the Cup in 2004 (not a romantic affair, that phrase just means I watched an awful lot of hockey). Versus aired playoff games every night for two months. It felt like getting together with an old girlfriend (you know, the part where you remember all the best parts of her and forget why you broke up with her in the first place?). The outstanding final that year between Pittsburgh and Detroit capped off a fantastic spring. Unfortunately though, hockey faded to the background again when the 2008-09 regular season started and it was again difficult to find games. I've still kept an eye on hockey from a distant, and am now ready to offer to the world my official uninformed Stanley Cup 1st Round Picks.  

                   

EASTERN CONFERENCE

#1 Washington Capitals vs. #8 New York Rangers

            Washington isn’t quite the offensive juggernaut it was in past seasons, but that may actually be a good team. An increased focus on defense has led the Capitals to giving up the fourth fewest goals in the NHL. As long as young goalie Michal Neuvirth is competent, Washington should be able to overpower the Rangers. I’ll be shocked if they go down in the first round as a top seed for a second straight year.

            Prediction = Capitals in 5

#2 Philadelphia Flyers vs. #7 Buffalo Sabres

            Buffalo was fighting for their playoff lives the second half of the season, and rose to the challenge by finishing the year on a 28-11-6 run. All-world goalie Ryan Miller (of 2010 Olympic fame) is more than capable of stoning a superior club for a seven game series. Philadelphia patched together their goaltending situation last year, but I don’t think they’ll be able to pull it off two years in a row.

            Prediction = Sabres in 7

#3 Boston Bruins vs. #6 Montreal Canadiens

            It seems like there is a rule that these two teams need to meet every single year in the NHL Playoffs. Maybe these two franchises are magnetically attracted to each other. As if the series needed any more juice, we are just a month removed from Zdeno Chara’s devastating hit on Max Pacioretty. Boston has looked like a team that is on a mission to avenge their epic choke against the Flyers in last year’s playoffs. Look for Montreal to bring plenty of fight, but the more physical Bruins will wear them down eventually.

            Prediction = Bruins in 7  

#4 Pittsburgh Penguins vs. #5 Tampa Bay Lightning

            What Pittsburgh has done in without superstar centers Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin has been remarkable. Marc-Andre Fleury has been outstanding the past two months, but has been all or nothing the past few seasons in the playoffs. Tampa Bay has a huge edge on the offensive end of the ice, but needs to get solid goaltending out of journeyman Dwayne Roloson. He’s done it before back in 2006 when he backstopped the Edmonton Oilers to the Stanley Cup Finals. Look for him to provide steady enough play to get Tampa Bay into the second round.

            Prediction = Lightning in 6

WESTERN CONFERENCE

#1 Vancouver Canucks vs. # Chicago Blackhawks

            Vancouver would probably much rather be playing Los Angeles as opposed to the defending Stanley Cup champions, but this is not the same Blackhawks team that knocked the Canucks out of the playoffs the past two seasons. I expect the Sedin twins and Roberto Luongo to power the Canucks into the second round.

            Prediction = Canucks in 5

#2 San Jose Sharks vs. #7 Los Angeles Kings

            I would’ve been all over the Kings in this series, but the loss of star center Anze Kopitar crushed them. San Jose has struggled in past seasons during the playoffs, but they couldn’t of asked for a better set-up here.

            Prediction = Sharks in 4

#3 Detroit Red Wings vs. #6 Phoenix Coyotes

            Phoenix pushed Detroit to seven games before losing to them in the first round a year ago. Coyotes’ goaltender Ilya Bryzgalov is the key. If he significantly outplays opposing goaltender Jimmy Howard (which isn’t that much of a stretch), Phoenix is capable of stealing this series. Detroit will be in real trouble if they don’t get Henrik Zetterberg back at any point after game 2.

            Prediction = Coyotes in 6

#4 Anaheim Ducks vs. #5 Nashville Predators

            This series is a tough one for me. On one side, you have 50-goal scorer Corey Perry, and Teamu Selanne, who is somewhere between 38 and 64 years old. On the other, you have badass defenseman Shea Weber and the breakout goalie of the year, Pekka Rinne. Most experts that I’ve read are choosing the Ducks, but I’m throwing my weight (what littler there is of it) behind the dude named Pekka and the Nashville Predators.

            Prediction = Predators in 7