10 Awesome Things That Happened This Past Weekend (5/11-5/13)

10. Osi Umenyiora Wishes LeSean McCoy a Happy Mother’s Day
            I’ll give Umenyiora an A+ for one of the more clever uses of Twitter in recent memory.

9. Andy Pettitte Returns

            Pettitte is going to have to order up a double shot of HGH after getting roughed up by the light-hitting Seattle Mariners Sunday.

8. Josh Hamilton Keeps Going Bonkers

            Hamilton is in a stratosphere of dominance right now usually reserved for Barry Bonds and Ken Griffey Jr. in TECMO Super Baseball. I had the chance to draft Hamilton in three leagues this year (as in, there were three drafts where it was him or another player that I was going to take at some point in the third or fourth round), but sadly only took him in one. Bummer.

7. Lebron and Wade Lead Bosh-less Heat

            I could see Indiana keeping four games with Miami close through 3 quarters, but the Lebron-Wade combo figuring out a way to win all of them.

6. Defying History, Clippers Win at Memphis

            This is one of the most confusing series I ever remember following in the past 10 years. I guess when characters like Zach Randolph and Vinny Del Negro are involved, craziness should be expected. Los Angeles has earned the right to get slaughtered by San Antonio in the second round.

5. Jimmie Johnson Earns Win #200 For Rick Hendrick

            Check out this page for a bunch of assorted facts about Rick Hendrick’s 200 wins in the Winston/Nextel/Sprint Cup Series. The numbers say that Mr. Hendrick is very fortunate to have employed Jeff Gordon and Jimmie Johnson over the past 18 years. 

4. Lakers Take Game 7, Earn Second Round Date With Oklahoma City

            Normally Laker victories don’t rank that high in this space, but I made a bunch of money thanks to the heroics of Steve Blake. 

3. Manchester City Scores Twice in Injury Time, Steals Premier League Title From Manchester United

            It’s hard enough to score two goals in 90 minutes, much less two goals in stoppage time. Considering the stakes, this is one of the most incredible comebacks in EPL history.

2. Rangers Finally Eliminate Pesky Capitals

            In a Stanley Cup Playoffs that has been completely upside down, the New York Rangers advancing to the Eastern Conference Finals is the only thing that makes sense.

1. Hobbled Celtics Survive Game 1 Against 76ers

            It wasn’t a thing of beauty, but Boston was bailed out by the play of Rajon Rondo and Kevin Garnett. I had more nice things to say before Game 2 of this series set the game of basketball back 60 years.         

10 Awesome Things That Happened This Past Weekend (10/21-10/23)

10. Houston Blows Out Titans 41-7
            So did I curse Tennessee more when I wagered money on them, or when I picked up their quarterback to sub for Michael Vick this week on one of my fantasy teams?

9. Manchester City Rocks Manchester United

            I’ll never pretend to be a futbol guy, but winning 6-1 in Man U’s house is list worthy.

8. Raiders Toss Six Picks, Get Crushed By Hapless Chiefs

            For those of you surprised by the stink bomb let loose by Carson Palmer in the second half of Sunday’s game, I’ll refer you to some analysis written by No Credentials a day after the Palmer trade went down.

7. Clint Bowyer Wins, Jimmie Johnson’s Title Hopes Are Toast (Hopefully)
            50 points behind points leader Carl Edwards, and stuck behind six other drivers, it looks like we will finally be crowning a new champion in NASCAR.

6. Pujols Mashes Three Homers in Game 3

            Texas evened the series Sunday night, but that doesn’t diminish Albert’s accomplishment Saturday night. Pujols becomes only the third player in MLB history to hit three home runs in a World Series game, joining hall of famers Babe Ruth and Reggie Jackson. Theo Epstein might have to tack on an extra $20 million if he wants to get Pujols into a Cub uniform.

5. Green Bay 33, Minnesota 27

4. Dallas 34, St. Louis 7
3. New Orleans 62, Indianapolis 7
            Why are three items together this week? Because the Cowboys, Packers, and Saints delivered No Credentials first successful three-team teaser on Sportsbook. I felt like Lance Armstrong during the final stage of the Tour ‘de France (minus the glass of wine and HGH pulsating through my veins) as New Orleans scored touchdown after touchdown against the hapless Colts. I’m looking forward to blowing all of my winnings next week on either another three-team teaser or betting on Brad Keselowski to win the Sprint Cup.

2. God’s Quarterback Pulls Off Epic Rally

            Similar to the junior mint episode of “Seinfeld”, something otherworldly appeared to happen in Miami today as Tim Tebow led two scoring drives in the final three minutes to force overtime. Or more likely, Miami remembered that they have to lose every game in order to get Andrew Luck on their team.

1. Hail Mary Dooms Wisconsin, Gives Michigan State Victory

            What does it take for college football to grab the top spot on the weekly top 10? A Hail Mary pass that knocks off a BCS title contender.